ohyesrobot.ordoliberal.com

2007-09-04

Original: 2007-09-04 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal

Transcript

Panel 1:
A judge (an older woman in black robes, gray hair pulled back, wearing glasses) sits at the bench addressing a nervous-looking young man in a blue suit and bow tie, presumably a lawyer.

Judge: "We're concerned that the phrase 'conclusive DNA evidence' might bias the jury. We would prefer the prosecution say 'mayyyyyyyyybe,' followed by a meaningful wink."

Caption (below panel): "Also, instead of 'stabbing,' we would prefer 'knife donation.'"

Votey:
A hand-drawn man with a worried expression speaks.
Man: "I'm worried my client's obvious guilt may bias the jury."

Alt text

A courtroom comic. An older woman judge in black robes and glasses leans toward a nervous young lawyer in a blue suit and bow tie. The judge says: 'We're concerned that the phrase "conclusive DNA evidence" might bias the jury. We would prefer the prosecution say "mayyyyyyyyybe," followed by a meaningful wink.' A caption beneath adds: 'Also, instead of "stabbing," we would prefer "knife donation."' The joke is a court sanitizing damning language into absurd euphemism. Votey: a crudely drawn worried man (a defense lawyer) says, 'I'm worried my client's obvious guilt may bias the jury.'

Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.