heretic
Original: heretic on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A man in a trench coat and fedora walks down a dark alley, shown in silhouette.
Man (narrating): I've been kicked out of every organized religion for my strange beliefs.
Panel 2: Close-up of the man's shadowed face under the brim of his hat.
Man (narrating): I've been called a monster, a fool, a liar... disgusting, wicked...
Panel 3: The man stands alone, a small figure against a vast crowd silhouette.
Man (narrating): I'm a pariah from nearly every social movement.
Panel 4: The man stands on a stage before a roaring crowd, arms raised, his hat flying off. The crowd shouts at him.
Man: But look, the data is pretty solid on this. Humans are trustworthy, kind, and peaceful most of the time!
Crowd member (left): Bastard!
Crowd member (right): Shun the heretic!
Votey:
Extreme close-up of the man's determined, sweating face.
Man: I shall interpret your disagreement generously!
Man (narrating): I've been kicked out of every organized religion for my strange beliefs.
Panel 2: Close-up of the man's shadowed face under the brim of his hat.
Man (narrating): I've been called a monster, a fool, a liar... disgusting, wicked...
Panel 3: The man stands alone, a small figure against a vast crowd silhouette.
Man (narrating): I'm a pariah from nearly every social movement.
Panel 4: The man stands on a stage before a roaring crowd, arms raised, his hat flying off. The crowd shouts at him.
Man: But look, the data is pretty solid on this. Humans are trustworthy, kind, and peaceful most of the time!
Crowd member (left): Bastard!
Crowd member (right): Shun the heretic!
Votey:
Extreme close-up of the man's determined, sweating face.
Man: I shall interpret your disagreement generously!
Alt text
A four-panel noir comic. In dramatic shadow, a man in a trench coat and fedora narrates his persecution: he's been kicked out of every organized religion for his strange beliefs (panel 1), called a monster, fool, liar, disgusting and wicked (panel 2), and is a pariah from nearly every social movement (panel 3). The reveal: standing on a stage before an angry shouting crowd, arms raised, he declares his radical heresy: 'But look, the data is pretty solid on this. Humans are trustworthy, kind, and peaceful most of the time!' The crowd screams 'Bastard!' and 'Shun the heretic!' The joke is that his persecuted forbidden belief is simply optimism about human nature. Votey: an extreme close-up of his determined face as he insists, 'I shall interpret your disagreement generously!'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.