forests
Original: forests on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1 (two figures walking through a forest of tall trees):
Figure A: Forests are so beautiful.
Figure B: Yes! Every leaf all the energy in natural white light and then green bathing in their useless green light in their electromagnetic sexuage.
Panel 2:
A tree: The very ground we walk on is made up of slogged out body parts and remains of dead ancestors. We are walking in their corpses even now!
Panel 3:
A tree: Now, let us drink their blood and eat their reproductive parts!
Another tree: You're ruining this, Ted.
Panel 4 (the two figures again, looking at the trees):
Figure: Oh god, it's those disgusting monkeys again.
Votey:
Speech bubble (from a tree): Time to pollen blast them.
(A large cloud of pollen billows out beneath the speech bubble toward the figures.)
Figure A: Forests are so beautiful.
Figure B: Yes! Every leaf all the energy in natural white light and then green bathing in their useless green light in their electromagnetic sexuage.
Panel 2:
A tree: The very ground we walk on is made up of slogged out body parts and remains of dead ancestors. We are walking in their corpses even now!
Panel 3:
A tree: Now, let us drink their blood and eat their reproductive parts!
Another tree: You're ruining this, Ted.
Panel 4 (the two figures again, looking at the trees):
Figure: Oh god, it's those disgusting monkeys again.
Votey:
Speech bubble (from a tree): Time to pollen blast them.
(A large cloud of pollen billows out beneath the speech bubble toward the figures.)
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic. In the first panel, two people walk through a forest of tall trees, admiring it; one says forests are so beautiful and the other rhapsodizes about leaves absorbing light in their 'electromagnetic sexuage.' The next panels reveal the trees themselves are talking: one tree solemnly explains that the very ground is made of the slogged-out body parts and corpses of their dead ancestors, that they are walking in their corpses even now. Another tree adds, 'Now let us drink their blood and eat their reproductive parts!' A second tree replies, 'You're ruining this, Ted.' In the final panel, the two human figures look up and one groans, 'Oh god, it's those disgusting monkeys again' — flipping the perspective so the trees find the humans repulsive. Votey aftercomic: a tree's speech bubble says 'Time to pollen blast them,' as a huge billowing cloud of pollen erupts toward the people below.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.