unique-2
Original: unique-2 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
An older man with gray hair and glasses sits beside a woman with reddish-brown hair.
Man: "People want to know what makes humans unique. But, every animal is 'unique' by some definition. Every animal can do SOMETHING no other animal does."
Panel 2:
Man: "So you can pick all sorts of arbitrary human behaviors, categorize them as a human speciality, and technically not be wrong."
Panel 3:
Woman (offscreen, in shadowed silhouette): "So that's what your lecture today is on?"
Man: "Well, sorta."
Panel 4 (captioned "SOON..."):
The man stands at a lectern in front of a red curtain, gesturing to an audience. He now has dramatic, jagged lightning-bolt-shaped sideburns.
Man: "Man is the only species that can grow lightning bolt sideburns!"
Votey:
A close-up of the man's face showing his lightning-bolt sideburns.
Voice (from a speech bubble): "Gaze in despair, dolphins!"
An older man with gray hair and glasses sits beside a woman with reddish-brown hair.
Man: "People want to know what makes humans unique. But, every animal is 'unique' by some definition. Every animal can do SOMETHING no other animal does."
Panel 2:
Man: "So you can pick all sorts of arbitrary human behaviors, categorize them as a human speciality, and technically not be wrong."
Panel 3:
Woman (offscreen, in shadowed silhouette): "So that's what your lecture today is on?"
Man: "Well, sorta."
Panel 4 (captioned "SOON..."):
The man stands at a lectern in front of a red curtain, gesturing to an audience. He now has dramatic, jagged lightning-bolt-shaped sideburns.
Man: "Man is the only species that can grow lightning bolt sideburns!"
Votey:
A close-up of the man's face showing his lightning-bolt sideburns.
Voice (from a speech bubble): "Gaze in despair, dolphins!"
Alt text
A four-panel comic. In the first two panels, an older gray-haired man with glasses talks to a red-haired woman, explaining that people want to know what makes humans unique, but every animal is 'unique' by some definition since every animal can do something no other animal can. He says you can therefore label any arbitrary human behavior a 'human speciality' and technically not be wrong. The woman, shown in silhouette, asks if that's what his lecture is on; he says "Well, sorta." The final panel, labeled "SOON," shows him at a lectern before a red curtain, now sporting absurd jagged lightning-bolt-shaped sideburns, proudly declaring: "Man is the only species that can grow lightning bolt sideburns!" The votey is a close-up of his lightning-bolt sideburns as he taunts: "Gaze in despair, dolphins!"
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.