ships
Original: ships on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Man with dark hair: The Trojan War was pointless.
Bald man: Why?
Panel 2:
Man with dark hair: There's no way Helen of Troy was that attractive.
Panel 3:
Man with dark hair: You got, what, 500,000 Greeks back then? She's the hottest person among 500,000?
Panel 4:
Man with dark hair: That's like saying she's the prettiest girl in the middle third of Idaho.
Panel 5:
Man with dark hair: In fairness, the thousand ships her face launched were pretty small by tonnage. The prettiest girl in Boise could probably get a medium-sized modern destroyer going.
Panel 6:
(The two men look at each other; no dialogue.)
Panel 7:
(The dark-haired man and another man face each other; no dialogue.)
Panel 8:
(The two men stand together; no dialogue.)
Panel 9:
Man with dark hair: My god, the future is going to have discussions like this about us, isn't it?
Bald man: That's why we need a nuclear war.
Votey:
Caption (in a thought/word balloon shape): The future looks bright as uranium!
(Below, a rhinoceros is drawn with simple lines.)
Man with dark hair: The Trojan War was pointless.
Bald man: Why?
Panel 2:
Man with dark hair: There's no way Helen of Troy was that attractive.
Panel 3:
Man with dark hair: You got, what, 500,000 Greeks back then? She's the hottest person among 500,000?
Panel 4:
Man with dark hair: That's like saying she's the prettiest girl in the middle third of Idaho.
Panel 5:
Man with dark hair: In fairness, the thousand ships her face launched were pretty small by tonnage. The prettiest girl in Boise could probably get a medium-sized modern destroyer going.
Panel 6:
(The two men look at each other; no dialogue.)
Panel 7:
(The dark-haired man and another man face each other; no dialogue.)
Panel 8:
(The two men stand together; no dialogue.)
Panel 9:
Man with dark hair: My god, the future is going to have discussions like this about us, isn't it?
Bald man: That's why we need a nuclear war.
Votey:
Caption (in a thought/word balloon shape): The future looks bright as uranium!
(Below, a rhinoceros is drawn with simple lines.)
Alt text
A nine-panel SMBC comic. A dark-haired man in a suit and a bald man in a suit have a conversation. The dark-haired man argues the Trojan War was pointless because 'there's no way Helen of Troy was that attractive' — reasoning that being the hottest person among 500,000 ancient Greeks is 'like saying she's the prettiest girl in the middle third of Idaho.' He then notes that the thousand ships her face launched were small by tonnage, so 'the prettiest girl in Boise could probably get a medium-sized modern destroyer going.' After a few silent panels, he realizes: 'My god, the future is going to have discussions like this about us, isn't it?' The bald man replies, 'That's why we need a nuclear war.' Votey (aftercomic): the caption 'The future looks bright as uranium!' floats above a simple line drawing of a rhinoceros.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.