science-jokes
Original: science-jokes on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Title banner: ALL SCIENCE JOKES RUINED:
Panel 1: A police officer leans toward an unseen driver.
Officer: Hey, Heisenberg! Do you know where you are and how fast you were going?
Panel 2: A man (Heisenberg) sits in the driver's seat of a car.
Heisenberg: Yes, to an extremely high degree of precision.
Panel 3: A man (Schrodinger) and a red-haired woman stand at a laptop.
Man: Hey, Schrodinger! Did you know there's a dead cat in your box?
Schrodinger: Not until you looked!
Panel 4: A close-up of Schrodinger with wide, blank white eyes.
Man (off-panel): But then, that is true of any box that has a cat in it.
Panel 5: A small child looks up at an older man (Einstein) with long gray hair.
Child: Hey, Einstein! Does the chicken cross the road or does the road cross the chicken?
Panel 6: A close-up of Einstein looking annoyed.
Einstein: That's Galilean relativity, shit-for-brains.
Votey: A close-up of Einstein's face, looking weary, with a thought/speech bubble.
Einstein: I should've stuck with Aryan Physics.
Panel 1: A police officer leans toward an unseen driver.
Officer: Hey, Heisenberg! Do you know where you are and how fast you were going?
Panel 2: A man (Heisenberg) sits in the driver's seat of a car.
Heisenberg: Yes, to an extremely high degree of precision.
Panel 3: A man (Schrodinger) and a red-haired woman stand at a laptop.
Man: Hey, Schrodinger! Did you know there's a dead cat in your box?
Schrodinger: Not until you looked!
Panel 4: A close-up of Schrodinger with wide, blank white eyes.
Man (off-panel): But then, that is true of any box that has a cat in it.
Panel 5: A small child looks up at an older man (Einstein) with long gray hair.
Child: Hey, Einstein! Does the chicken cross the road or does the road cross the chicken?
Panel 6: A close-up of Einstein looking annoyed.
Einstein: That's Galilean relativity, shit-for-brains.
Votey: A close-up of Einstein's face, looking weary, with a thought/speech bubble.
Einstein: I should've stuck with Aryan Physics.
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic titled "ALL SCIENCE JOKES RUINED:" Each pair of panels ruins a classic physics joke by having the scientist answer too literally. Panels 1-2: A police officer asks, "Hey, Heisenberg! Do you know where you are and how fast you were going?" Heisenberg, in his car, replies, "Yes, to an extremely high degree of precision." Panels 3-4: A man tells a scientist at a laptop, "Hey, Schrodinger! Did you know there's a dead cat in your box?" Schrodinger says, "Not until you looked!" In a close-up of his wide blank-white eyes, the man notes, "But then, that is true of any box that has a cat in it." Panels 5-6: A small child asks an old gray-haired man, "Hey, Einstein! Does the chicken cross the road or does the road cross the chicken?" A close-up of an irritated Einstein replies, "That's Galilean relativity, shit-for-brains." Votey: A weary close-up of Einstein thinking, "I should've stuck with Aryan Physics" -- a dark joke referencing the Nazi-era pseudoscientific "Deutsche Physik" movement that opposed his relativity.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.