perpetual-motion
Original: perpetual-motion on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Man (to a glowing halo-like disc representing God): "GOD, WHY'D YOU CREATE CONSERVATION OF ENERGY? WHY CAN'T YOU GET SOMETHING FOR NOTHING?"
God (the glowing disc): "BUT YOU CAN."
Panel 2:
Man: "YOU MEAN LIKE... HOW WE GAIN FROM INTANGIBLE THINGS, LIKE FRIENDSHIP, LOVE, COMPASSION?"
God: "NO, LIKE FROM MAGNETS."
Panel 3:
God: "WATCH, YOU JUST TAKE MAGNETS AND PUT THEM IN A CIRCLE. DROP IN A PIECE OF IRON AND WHAM! IT GOES AROUND FOREVER. FREE ENERGY."
Panel 4:
Man: "HONESTLY, HOW DID YOU GUYS MISS THIS?"
God: "WE HAVE TO KILL ALL THE PHYSICISTS."
Votey:
A man's face looks up with wide, somewhat unhinged eyes. Speech bubble (God): "With an infinity-powered laser."
Man (to a glowing halo-like disc representing God): "GOD, WHY'D YOU CREATE CONSERVATION OF ENERGY? WHY CAN'T YOU GET SOMETHING FOR NOTHING?"
God (the glowing disc): "BUT YOU CAN."
Panel 2:
Man: "YOU MEAN LIKE... HOW WE GAIN FROM INTANGIBLE THINGS, LIKE FRIENDSHIP, LOVE, COMPASSION?"
God: "NO, LIKE FROM MAGNETS."
Panel 3:
God: "WATCH, YOU JUST TAKE MAGNETS AND PUT THEM IN A CIRCLE. DROP IN A PIECE OF IRON AND WHAM! IT GOES AROUND FOREVER. FREE ENERGY."
Panel 4:
Man: "HONESTLY, HOW DID YOU GUYS MISS THIS?"
God: "WE HAVE TO KILL ALL THE PHYSICISTS."
Votey:
A man's face looks up with wide, somewhat unhinged eyes. Speech bubble (God): "With an infinity-powered laser."
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic. A red-haired man in a green shirt talks to God, depicted as a glowing golden disc ringed with small triangles (a halo). Panel 1: The man asks, "God, why'd you create conservation of energy? Why can't you get something for nothing?" God replies, "But you can." Panel 2: The man guesses, "You mean like... how we gain from intangible things, like friendship, love, compassion?" God says, "No, like from magnets." Panel 3: God explains, "Watch, you just take magnets and put them in a circle. Drop in a piece of iron and WHAM! It goes around forever. Free energy" -- describing a classic (impossible) magnetic perpetual-motion machine. Panel 4: The man, now looking slightly crazed, asks, "Honestly, how did you guys miss this?" God answers, "We have to kill all the physicists." The joke: God endorses debunked free-energy pseudoscience and concludes the only fix is murdering the physicists who know better. Votey (aftercomic): A close-up of the man's wide-eyed, manic face as God adds, "With an infinity-powered laser."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.