2014-08-16
Original: 2014-08-16 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Interviewer (a woman with dark hair, off to the side): How can you run a "science channel" but have most of your shows be about ghosts and aliens and other nonsense?
Panel 2:
Man with glasses: Well, each year we introduce a show and we hypothesize that certain combinations of topics result in higher ratings. We compare the new show to a "control show" in a similar time slot.
Panel 3:
Man with glasses: Having collected ratings data, we do some statistical analysis to determine which characteristics are most relevant to the observed differences.
Panel 4:
Interviewer: Wait, I thought "science channel" meant you were a channel about science, not a channel where you do science.
Man with glasses: What?!... Do other people think that?
Panel 5:
Interviewer: You guys are idiots?
(On a TV screen / poster beside them: "DINOSAURS OF ATLANTIS")
Votey:
Large text over a faded question mark: WERE THE DINOSAURS OF ATLANTIS REALLY ALIENS FROM THE BIBLE?
Interviewer (a woman with dark hair, off to the side): How can you run a "science channel" but have most of your shows be about ghosts and aliens and other nonsense?
Panel 2:
Man with glasses: Well, each year we introduce a show and we hypothesize that certain combinations of topics result in higher ratings. We compare the new show to a "control show" in a similar time slot.
Panel 3:
Man with glasses: Having collected ratings data, we do some statistical analysis to determine which characteristics are most relevant to the observed differences.
Panel 4:
Interviewer: Wait, I thought "science channel" meant you were a channel about science, not a channel where you do science.
Man with glasses: What?!... Do other people think that?
Panel 5:
Interviewer: You guys are idiots?
(On a TV screen / poster beside them: "DINOSAURS OF ATLANTIS")
Votey:
Large text over a faded question mark: WERE THE DINOSAURS OF ATLANTIS REALLY ALIENS FROM THE BIBLE?
Alt text
A five-panel comic. A woman interviews a man with glasses about a TV "science channel." She asks how it can be a science channel when most shows are about ghosts, aliens and nonsense. He earnestly explains that each year they hypothesize which combinations of show topics raise ratings, run a new show against a "control show" in a similar time slot, then do statistical analysis on the ratings data to find which characteristics matter most. The interviewer says she thought "science channel" meant a channel ABOUT science, not a channel where you DO science. He looks shocked: "What?!... Do other people think that?" She replies "You guys are idiots?" Beside them is a show poster reading "DINOSAURS OF ATLANTIS." The votey (bonus panel) is a sensational title card over a giant question mark: "WERE THE DINOSAURS OF ATLANTIS REALLY ALIENS FROM THE BIBLE?"
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.