2014-07-07
Original: 2014-07-07 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Mother (named Jenny by her daughter): JENNY, WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS SO NEGATIVE ALL THE TIME?
Daughter: MOM, I'M FIFTEEN! MY LIFE IS JUST BEGINNING.
Panel 2:
Daughter: THE OLDER YOU GET, THE FEWER CHOICES YOU HAVE! LOOK AT YOU! THE BIGGEST CHOICE YOU MADE TODAY WAS WHICH COAT TO WEAR TO WORK.
Panel 3:
Daughter: MEANWHILE, EVERYTHING I DO NOW COULD BE LIFECHANGING! THERE ARE SO MANY POSSIBILITIES, IT'S OVERWHELMING! IF I WASN'T BEING CONSTANTLY DISMISSIVE AND IRONIC, I'D EXPLODE!
Panel 4:
Daughter: YOU MUST BE SO HAPPY BEING A GROWNUP.
Mother (Jenny): GO FUCK YOURSELF.
Votey:
Close-up of the mother's face, smiling, with a speech bubble: EAT SHIT, HONEY
Mother (named Jenny by her daughter): JENNY, WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS SO NEGATIVE ALL THE TIME?
Daughter: MOM, I'M FIFTEEN! MY LIFE IS JUST BEGINNING.
Panel 2:
Daughter: THE OLDER YOU GET, THE FEWER CHOICES YOU HAVE! LOOK AT YOU! THE BIGGEST CHOICE YOU MADE TODAY WAS WHICH COAT TO WEAR TO WORK.
Panel 3:
Daughter: MEANWHILE, EVERYTHING I DO NOW COULD BE LIFECHANGING! THERE ARE SO MANY POSSIBILITIES, IT'S OVERWHELMING! IF I WASN'T BEING CONSTANTLY DISMISSIVE AND IRONIC, I'D EXPLODE!
Panel 4:
Daughter: YOU MUST BE SO HAPPY BEING A GROWNUP.
Mother (Jenny): GO FUCK YOURSELF.
Votey:
Close-up of the mother's face, smiling, with a speech bubble: EAT SHIT, HONEY
Alt text
A four-panel comic. Panel 1: A mother with dark hair asks her teenage daughter, 'Jenny, why are you always so negative all the time?' The daughter (red hair) replies, 'Mom, I'm fifteen! My life is just beginning.' Panel 2: The daughter lectures, 'The older you get, the fewer choices you have! Look at you! The biggest choice you made today was which coat to wear to work.' Panel 3: She continues with raised hands, 'Meanwhile, everything I do now could be lifechanging! There are so many possibilities, it's overwhelming! If I wasn't being constantly dismissive and ironic, I'd explode!' Panel 4: The daughter says smugly, 'You must be so happy being a grownup.' The mother, deadpan, replies, 'Go fuck yourself.' Votey (aftercomic): A close-up of the mother's face, now smiling pleasantly, saying in a speech bubble, 'Eat shit, honey.'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.