2014-01-19
Original: 2014-01-19 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Narration: Oh... someone left a laptop on the park bench.
Panel 2:
Man: What should I do, ID?
Devil (id): Take it! If it's so careless he doesn't deserve it! TAKE IT!
Panel 3:
Man: What do you think, superego?
Angel (superego): You'd better take it to the police. Doing good is its own reward.
Panel 4:
Man: What do you think, pure reason?
Pure reason: It makes no difference whether you take it or not. You and the machine and its owner are just momentarily molecular arrangements. To the extent that there is a persistent "you," it will survive for a negligible portion of the lifespan of reality. Then we'll be obliterated and forgotten.
Panel 5:
Pure reason: The existence of the decision itself is a mere distraction on the road to oblivion.
Panel 6:
Man: You might as well-- HEY! GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME!
(The devil/id is shown wrestling/grabbing the angel/superego.)
Panel 7:
A woman: You okay man?
Man: I think... I'm undergoing a religious experience.
Votey:
Man (head shown): No. Wait. Just insanity.
Narration: Oh... someone left a laptop on the park bench.
Panel 2:
Man: What should I do, ID?
Devil (id): Take it! If it's so careless he doesn't deserve it! TAKE IT!
Panel 3:
Man: What do you think, superego?
Angel (superego): You'd better take it to the police. Doing good is its own reward.
Panel 4:
Man: What do you think, pure reason?
Pure reason: It makes no difference whether you take it or not. You and the machine and its owner are just momentarily molecular arrangements. To the extent that there is a persistent "you," it will survive for a negligible portion of the lifespan of reality. Then we'll be obliterated and forgotten.
Panel 5:
Pure reason: The existence of the decision itself is a mere distraction on the road to oblivion.
Panel 6:
Man: You might as well-- HEY! GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME!
(The devil/id is shown wrestling/grabbing the angel/superego.)
Panel 7:
A woman: You okay man?
Man: I think... I'm undergoing a religious experience.
Votey:
Man (head shown): No. Wait. Just insanity.
Alt text
A seven-panel SMBC comic. Panel 1: A laptop sits on a park bench; narration reads "Oh... someone left a laptop on the park bench." Panel 2: A red-haired man consults a tiny red devil (labeled by his line as his id), who shouts "Take it! If it's so careless he doesn't deserve it! TAKE IT!" Panel 3: He turns to a white-robed angel, his superego, who advises "You'd better take it to the police. Doing good is its own reward." Panel 4: He asks "pure reason," depicted as a green pyramid/triangle, which delivers a long nihilistic monologue: taking it makes no difference because everyone is just a momentary molecular arrangement and will be obliterated and forgotten. Panel 5: The pyramid continues, "The existence of the decision itself is a mere distraction on the road to oblivion." Panel 6: The man begins "You might as well--" then yells "HEY! GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME!" as the red devil tackles and wrestles the angel. Panel 7: A woman walks up and asks "You okay man?"; the man, looking dazed, replies "I think... I'm undergoing a religious experience." Votey: A close-up of the man's head as he reconsiders, saying "No. Wait. Just insanity."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.