2013-06-19
Original: 2013-06-19 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Woman: Time machines don't make sense.
Man: Why not?
Panel 2:
Man: Step in the machine, press a button, go to a different time.
Panel 3:
Woman: Suppose it works like this: A time machine inside another, and inside the outer one goes back while the inner one goes forward.
Man: You end up with two devices, one of which is supposed to be in the other, but which can't be because it's not at the same time.
Panel 4:
Woman: Well, okay. What if the outer machine creates its own internal time while it's traveling? Then, the inner machine only travels in internal time.
Man: STUPID
Panel 5:
Woman: Suppose you put a person in each of THOSE machines. The outer person doesn't age while he goes back in time, and the inner person doesn't age going forward.
Panel 6:
Woman: Then the inner one gets out. Now they're from different times and traveled different ways, but now share space, time, and age. If that's the--
Man: (crying) HRKHG
Panel 7:
Woman: Daaammit. They always have an aneurysm before I hit the really weird stuff.
Votey:
Caption: TURTLENECK AND GLASSES: NOT WORN IN REAL LIFE SINCE 1973.
(Below, a drawing of a person wearing a turtleneck and glasses.)
Woman: Time machines don't make sense.
Man: Why not?
Panel 2:
Man: Step in the machine, press a button, go to a different time.
Panel 3:
Woman: Suppose it works like this: A time machine inside another, and inside the outer one goes back while the inner one goes forward.
Man: You end up with two devices, one of which is supposed to be in the other, but which can't be because it's not at the same time.
Panel 4:
Woman: Well, okay. What if the outer machine creates its own internal time while it's traveling? Then, the inner machine only travels in internal time.
Man: STUPID
Panel 5:
Woman: Suppose you put a person in each of THOSE machines. The outer person doesn't age while he goes back in time, and the inner person doesn't age going forward.
Panel 6:
Woman: Then the inner one gets out. Now they're from different times and traveled different ways, but now share space, time, and age. If that's the--
Man: (crying) HRKHG
Panel 7:
Woman: Daaammit. They always have an aneurysm before I hit the really weird stuff.
Votey:
Caption: TURTLENECK AND GLASSES: NOT WORN IN REAL LIFE SINCE 1973.
(Below, a drawing of a person wearing a turtleneck and glasses.)
Alt text
A tall multi-panel comic. A woman with brown hair argues with a man about time travel. Panel 1: She says "Time machines don't make sense." He asks "Why not?" Panel 2: He explains, "Step in the machine, press a button, go to a different time." Panel 3: She proposes a model of a time machine nested inside another, the outer going back while the inner goes forward; he objects that you'd end up with two devices that can't coexist because they're not at the same time. Panel 4: She refines the idea with each machine creating its own internal time; he just says "STUPID." Panel 5: She escalates, putting a person in each machine so neither ages. Panel 6: As she keeps elaborating, the man bursts into tears with the sound "HRKHG." Panel 7: She sighs, "Daaammit. They always have an aneurysm before I hit the really weird stuff." Votey: A caption reads "TURTLENECK AND GLASSES: NOT WORN IN REAL LIFE SINCE 1973," above a sketch of a person wearing a turtleneck and glasses.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.