2006-09-01
Original: 2006-09-01 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A map of the African continent, shown in yellow against a purple background. No text.
Panel 2: Against an orange sky, a crate descends by parachute. The crate is labeled "AIDS RELIEF." A second, smaller parachute drops a box labeled (illegibly) nearby.
Panel 3: The crate has landed on the ground. A man runs toward it.
Man: LOOK!
Panel 4: The man crouches at the open "AIDS RELIEF" crate, lifting an item out of it, looking puzzled.
Man: A PLAYSTATION?
Panel 5: Close-up of the man holding his head in his hands in frustration.
Man: DAMMIT!
Panel 6: The man stands among the crates, arms raised, shouting angrily at the sky.
Man: DAMN YOU AMERICANS! IS THIS SOME KIND OF JOKE? HOW IN THE WORLD IS THIS SUPPOSED TO HELP?!
Man: HUH?!
Panel 7 (caption: SUBSEQUENTLY...): The man, looking flatly unimpressed, sits with the PlayStation controller in his lap, hands on it. A smiling woman approaches.
Woman: HEY, YOU WANT TO HAVE SEX?
Man: MEH.
Votey: A hand-drawn line graph. The y-axis is labeled "population" and the x-axis is labeled "price of amusement." A red curve rises to a peak as price of amusement increases from zero, then plunges sharply downward as the price of amusement continues to rise.
Panel 2: Against an orange sky, a crate descends by parachute. The crate is labeled "AIDS RELIEF." A second, smaller parachute drops a box labeled (illegibly) nearby.
Panel 3: The crate has landed on the ground. A man runs toward it.
Man: LOOK!
Panel 4: The man crouches at the open "AIDS RELIEF" crate, lifting an item out of it, looking puzzled.
Man: A PLAYSTATION?
Panel 5: Close-up of the man holding his head in his hands in frustration.
Man: DAMMIT!
Panel 6: The man stands among the crates, arms raised, shouting angrily at the sky.
Man: DAMN YOU AMERICANS! IS THIS SOME KIND OF JOKE? HOW IN THE WORLD IS THIS SUPPOSED TO HELP?!
Man: HUH?!
Panel 7 (caption: SUBSEQUENTLY...): The man, looking flatly unimpressed, sits with the PlayStation controller in his lap, hands on it. A smiling woman approaches.
Woman: HEY, YOU WANT TO HAVE SEX?
Man: MEH.
Votey: A hand-drawn line graph. The y-axis is labeled "population" and the x-axis is labeled "price of amusement." A red curve rises to a peak as price of amusement increases from zero, then plunges sharply downward as the price of amusement continues to rise.
Alt text
A seven-panel SMBC comic. Panel 1: a yellow map of Africa on a purple background. Panel 2: under an orange sky, a crate labeled "AIDS RELIEF" parachutes down. Panel 3: a man runs to the landed crate, shouting "LOOK!" Panel 4: he pulls an item from the open AIDS RELIEF crate, puzzled: "A PLAYSTATION?" Panel 5: close-up of him clutching his head: "DAMMIT!" Panel 6: he raises his arms and yells at the sky, "DAMN YOU AMERICANS! IS THIS SOME KIND OF JOKE? HOW IN THE WORLD IS THIS SUPPOSED TO HELP?! HUH?!" Panel 7, captioned "SUBSEQUENTLY...": he sits gripping a PlayStation controller with a flat, absorbed expression as a smiling woman walks up and asks, "HEY, YOU WANT TO HAVE SEX?" He replies, "MEH." The joke: instead of medical aid, the relief crate contains a game console, which the man at first decries as useless, but it then absorbs his attention so completely he loses interest in sex. Votey (aftercomic): a hand-drawn red line graph with the y-axis labeled "population" and the x-axis labeled "price of amusement." The curve rises to a peak then crashes steeply downward, implying that cheap, engrossing amusement causes population to collapse.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.