Prophecy
Original: Prophecy on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Wizard (to a young red-haired boy): YOU ARE CHOSEN TO DEFEAT THE MOST EVIL PERSON IN HISTORY!
Boy (arms raised): WOOHOO!
Panel 2:
The boy, now a grinning young man holding a staff with a red orb: OH MAN, I WAS SO FULL OF AMBITION, BUT NOW I KNOW I'M DESTINED FOR GREATNESS NO MATTER WHAT I DO!
Panel 3:
The young man (continuing, laughing): I'M GONNA LIVE A LIFE OF IDLENESS AND HEDONISM, MAKING NO EFFORT WHATSOEVER UNTIL SOMEHOW THE VILLAIN IS THWARTED BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT THE PROPHECY SAID!
Panel 4:
Caption: 80 YEARS LATER
Doctor (to the now-elderly man in a hospital bed): I'M SORRY SIR, YOU HAVE MAYBE ONE WEEK TO LIVE.
Elderly man: BUT I NEVER DEFEATED HEYYYYYYYY
Votey:
Speech bubble (from off-panel/the dying man, over a melted, blob-like form): I COULD'VE KILLED THEM ALL.
Wizard (to a young red-haired boy): YOU ARE CHOSEN TO DEFEAT THE MOST EVIL PERSON IN HISTORY!
Boy (arms raised): WOOHOO!
Panel 2:
The boy, now a grinning young man holding a staff with a red orb: OH MAN, I WAS SO FULL OF AMBITION, BUT NOW I KNOW I'M DESTINED FOR GREATNESS NO MATTER WHAT I DO!
Panel 3:
The young man (continuing, laughing): I'M GONNA LIVE A LIFE OF IDLENESS AND HEDONISM, MAKING NO EFFORT WHATSOEVER UNTIL SOMEHOW THE VILLAIN IS THWARTED BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT THE PROPHECY SAID!
Panel 4:
Caption: 80 YEARS LATER
Doctor (to the now-elderly man in a hospital bed): I'M SORRY SIR, YOU HAVE MAYBE ONE WEEK TO LIVE.
Elderly man: BUT I NEVER DEFEATED HEYYYYYYYY
Votey:
Speech bubble (from off-panel/the dying man, over a melted, blob-like form): I COULD'VE KILLED THEM ALL.
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic. Panel 1: A robed wizard tells a young red-haired boy, "You are chosen to defeat the most evil person in history!" The boy throws his arms up and cheers, "Woohoo!" Panel 2: The boy, now a grinning young man holding a wizard staff with a red orb, says, "Oh man, I was so full of ambition, but now I know I'm destined for greatness no matter what I do!" Panel 3: Laughing, he continues, "I'm gonna live a life of idleness and hedonism, making no effort whatsoever until somehow the villain is thwarted because that's what the prophecy said!" Panel 4: Caption reads "80 years later." A doctor stands over the man, now elderly and frail in a hospital bed, saying, "I'm sorry sir, you have maybe one week to live." The old man protests, "But I never defeated HEYYYYYYYY" as he apparently dies mid-sentence. Votey (bonus panel): A melted, blob-like collapsed figure lies at the bottom while a speech bubble above it laments, "I could've killed them all." The joke: relying on a prophecy as a guarantee, the chosen one wastes his whole life in idleness and dies having accomplished nothing, the villain never defeated.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.