Theodicy
Original: Theodicy on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1
Man (red-haired, in red shirt): God, if you're all powerful, all knowing, and all good, how come you never do the dishes?
Panel 2
God (yellow speech bubble, no visible speaker): Well... if we define all-powerful to include... wait, what?
Panel 3
Man: Look I accept there are weird philosophical arguments that allow tsunamis and plagues and stuff. It's over my head. But jeez, like maybe five minutes at the sink once in a while?
Panel 4
Man: Technically YOU MADE the constituent parts of these dirty dishes! DO YOUR SHARE!
Panel 5
Man (pointing accusingly): [no dialogue]
Panel 6
The man lies in bed, propped up, talking toward the ceiling.
Panel 7 (God's reply, yellow bubble)
God: This doesn't warrant a great cloud of locusts but I AM gonna out-of-business your favorite dim sum place.
Panel 8
A small silhouette of the man's head in darkness.
Man: Come on!
Votey:
God (large speech bubble at top): Behold! It shall return under new management but never taste as good!
Below, a close-up of the man's distraught, grimacing face.
Man (red-haired, in red shirt): God, if you're all powerful, all knowing, and all good, how come you never do the dishes?
Panel 2
God (yellow speech bubble, no visible speaker): Well... if we define all-powerful to include... wait, what?
Panel 3
Man: Look I accept there are weird philosophical arguments that allow tsunamis and plagues and stuff. It's over my head. But jeez, like maybe five minutes at the sink once in a while?
Panel 4
Man: Technically YOU MADE the constituent parts of these dirty dishes! DO YOUR SHARE!
Panel 5
Man (pointing accusingly): [no dialogue]
Panel 6
The man lies in bed, propped up, talking toward the ceiling.
Panel 7 (God's reply, yellow bubble)
God: This doesn't warrant a great cloud of locusts but I AM gonna out-of-business your favorite dim sum place.
Panel 8
A small silhouette of the man's head in darkness.
Man: Come on!
Votey:
God (large speech bubble at top): Behold! It shall return under new management but never taste as good!
Below, a close-up of the man's distraught, grimacing face.
Alt text
An eight-panel SMBC comic. A red-haired man lies in bed at night arguing with God, whose replies appear in yellow speech bubbles. The man complains: 'God, if you're all powerful, all knowing, and all good, how come you never do the dishes?' God starts to respond philosophically and gets cut off. The man rants that he accepts weird arguments justifying tsunamis and plagues, but jeez, couldn't God spend five minutes at the sink? He points and yells that God technically made the constituent parts of the dirty dishes, so he should do his share. God answers that this doesn't warrant a great cloud of locusts, but He IS going to put the man's favorite dim sum place out of business. The man, shown as a tiny silhouette in the dark, cries 'Come on!' Votey (aftercomic): God declares, 'Behold! It shall return under new management but never taste as good!' over a close-up of the man's anguished, grimacing face.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.