Bitter
Original: Bitter on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Child: Dad, why do adults get bitter over time?
Dad: That's evolution.
Panel 2:
Dad: In the days of the savannah, humans were stalked by lions. We evolved to be bitter so they wouldn't like the taste of us.
Panel 3:
Dad: It's why people who have to work a lot tend to be most bitter. Their bodies think they're community defenders and up the bitterness in defense.
Panel 4:
Dad: That's why they talk about their health issues and modern society so loudly. So predators can hear.
Dad: The lions are gone, but the complaints live on.
Votey:
Dad: It's why I also try to be full of shit.
Child: Dad, why do adults get bitter over time?
Dad: That's evolution.
Panel 2:
Dad: In the days of the savannah, humans were stalked by lions. We evolved to be bitter so they wouldn't like the taste of us.
Panel 3:
Dad: It's why people who have to work a lot tend to be most bitter. Their bodies think they're community defenders and up the bitterness in defense.
Panel 4:
Dad: That's why they talk about their health issues and modern society so loudly. So predators can hear.
Dad: The lions are gone, but the complaints live on.
Votey:
Dad: It's why I also try to be full of shit.
Alt text
A four-panel comic. A young red-haired child asks their father why adults get bitter over time, and the dad replies, "That's evolution." The dad explains that in the days of the savannah, humans were stalked by lions, so we evolved to be bitter-tasting so the lions wouldn't want to eat us. He continues that people who work a lot tend to be most bitter because their bodies think they're community defenders and ramp up bitterness in defense. In the final panel, shown from a distance with the small child and seated dad in a large room, he adds that this is why such people talk loudly about their health issues and modern society, so predators can hear, concluding, "The lions are gone, but the complaints live on." Votey: A close-up of the dad's smiling face as he adds, "It's why I also try to be full of shit."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.