bring-back
Original: bring-back on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Man with flame-like orange hair (to a small robot): Auto-Tron-9x, is it possible to bring dead people back with AI?
Robot: Of course.
Panel 2:
Robot: Consider Charles Dickens. He wrote 15 novels, and endless novellas, short stories, essays... We can recover him simply by simulating many human lives and finding the only sequence that results in those unique works.
Panel 3:
Man: Can you bring back famous scientists?
Robot: Sometimes.
Panel 4:
Robot: We can't get them back by their theories, unless those theories were colossally and uniquely wrong. Every planet will have its Darwin, its Newton. But ideas like phrenology or 'hollow earth theory' are particular to morons who tend to write a lot.
Panel 5:
Man: What about me?
Robot: Most of your writing is work emails and poorly formulated political views. Fully one-third of all living humans could've written your corpus.
Panel 6:
Man: I'll show you! I'll drop out of society and become an artist!
Robot: Ha! That's exactly what everyone says. You are just precious.
Votey:
Robot: Sorry, sorry. Go ahead and express some typical expressions, using cliche phrases.
Man with flame-like orange hair (to a small robot): Auto-Tron-9x, is it possible to bring dead people back with AI?
Robot: Of course.
Panel 2:
Robot: Consider Charles Dickens. He wrote 15 novels, and endless novellas, short stories, essays... We can recover him simply by simulating many human lives and finding the only sequence that results in those unique works.
Panel 3:
Man: Can you bring back famous scientists?
Robot: Sometimes.
Panel 4:
Robot: We can't get them back by their theories, unless those theories were colossally and uniquely wrong. Every planet will have its Darwin, its Newton. But ideas like phrenology or 'hollow earth theory' are particular to morons who tend to write a lot.
Panel 5:
Man: What about me?
Robot: Most of your writing is work emails and poorly formulated political views. Fully one-third of all living humans could've written your corpus.
Panel 6:
Man: I'll show you! I'll drop out of society and become an artist!
Robot: Ha! That's exactly what everyone says. You are just precious.
Votey:
Robot: Sorry, sorry. Go ahead and express some typical expressions, using cliche phrases.
Alt text
A six-panel comic. A man with spiky flame-like orange hair talks to a small box-shaped robot standing in a grassy outdoor scene. The man asks Auto-Tron-9x if it's possible to bring dead people back with AI. The robot says "Of course," explaining that someone like Charles Dickens, with his huge unique body of work, could be recovered by simulating many human lives until the only sequence producing those works is found. When the man asks about famous scientists, the robot says "Sometimes" — you can't recover them from theories every planet would eventually produce (Darwin, Newton), only from uniquely wrong ideas like phrenology or hollow-earth theory written by prolific cranks. When the man asks about himself, the robot deflates him: his writing is mostly work emails and poorly formulated political views, and one-third of all living humans could have written his entire corpus. The man declares he'll drop out of society and become an artist; the robot laughs that this is exactly what everyone says, and that he is "just precious." In the votey panel, the robot adds, in a mock-apologetic tone: "Sorry, sorry. Go ahead and express some typical expressions, using cliche phrases."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.