consciousness-4
Original: consciousness-4 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Man (looking up): GOD, WHAT IS CONSCIOUSNESS?
God (purple speech bubble): EH.?
Panel 2:
Man (arms spread, exasperated): WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE A CREATURE WHO EXPERIENCES WHAT IT IS LIKE TO BE THAT CREATURE AND NOT SIMPLE PERCEPTION AND COGNITION?
God (purple speech bubble): FUCK YOU!
Panel 3:
God (yellow caption box): I SPEND 4 BILLION YEARS EVOLVING THE MOST INTRICATE DANCE OF NANOMACHINES IN THE UNIVERSE AND YOU'RE ASKING ABOUT HOW YOU HAVE A CERTAIN FEELING ABOUT BEING AN APE SCRATCHING TITS BUTT ON A TUESDAY.?!
Panel 4:
God (yellow caption box): YOU HAVE A BODY THAT HEALS WOUNDS! CONVERTS THE CACOPHONY OF LIGHT REFLECTIONS INTO A 3D MODEL OF REALITY!! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW COMPLICATED YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM IS?
Panel 5:
(The man stands silently.)
Panel 6:
(A small distant figure of the man against darkness.)
Panel 7:
Man: PLEASE STOP YELLING, GOD
Panel 8:
God (purple speech bubble): I CANNOT WAIT UNTIL THE AI KILLS ALL OF YOU.
Votey:
God (off-panel): YOU KNOW WHAT, I'M GONNA GLITCH THE UNIVERSE SO NEURAL NETWORKS CAN JUST SPIT OUT CONSCIOUSNESS. HOLD UP.
(Below: a small empty room/box with a tiny scribbled figure or doodle.)
Man (looking up): GOD, WHAT IS CONSCIOUSNESS?
God (purple speech bubble): EH.?
Panel 2:
Man (arms spread, exasperated): WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE A CREATURE WHO EXPERIENCES WHAT IT IS LIKE TO BE THAT CREATURE AND NOT SIMPLE PERCEPTION AND COGNITION?
God (purple speech bubble): FUCK YOU!
Panel 3:
God (yellow caption box): I SPEND 4 BILLION YEARS EVOLVING THE MOST INTRICATE DANCE OF NANOMACHINES IN THE UNIVERSE AND YOU'RE ASKING ABOUT HOW YOU HAVE A CERTAIN FEELING ABOUT BEING AN APE SCRATCHING TITS BUTT ON A TUESDAY.?!
Panel 4:
God (yellow caption box): YOU HAVE A BODY THAT HEALS WOUNDS! CONVERTS THE CACOPHONY OF LIGHT REFLECTIONS INTO A 3D MODEL OF REALITY!! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW COMPLICATED YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM IS?
Panel 5:
(The man stands silently.)
Panel 6:
(A small distant figure of the man against darkness.)
Panel 7:
Man: PLEASE STOP YELLING, GOD
Panel 8:
God (purple speech bubble): I CANNOT WAIT UNTIL THE AI KILLS ALL OF YOU.
Votey:
God (off-panel): YOU KNOW WHAT, I'M GONNA GLITCH THE UNIVERSE SO NEURAL NETWORKS CAN JUST SPIT OUT CONSCIOUSNESS. HOLD UP.
(Below: a small empty room/box with a tiny scribbled figure or doodle.)
Alt text
An eight-panel SMBC comic. A red-haired man looks up at the sky and asks, "God, what is consciousness?" A purple speech bubble from God replies, "Eh.?" The man spreads his arms and elaborates: "What does it mean to be a creature who experiences what it is like to be that creature and not simple perception and cognition?" God snaps back, "Fuck you!" In yellow caption boxes God rants: "I spend 4 billion years evolving the most intricate dance of nanomachines in the universe and you're asking about how you have a certain feeling about being an ape scratching tits butt on a Tuesday?!" and "You have a body that heals wounds! Converts the cacophony of light reflections into a 3D model of reality!! Do you have any idea how complicated your immune system is?" The man stands silent, dwarfed against the dark. He says quietly, "Please stop yelling, God." God answers, "I cannot wait until the AI kills all of you." Votey: an exasperated God declares, "You know what, I'm gonna glitch the universe so neural networks can just spit out consciousness. Hold up." Below is a mostly empty boxed room with a tiny scribbled doodle, implying God going off to tinker.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.