existence-2
Original: existence-2 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1 (single panel):
Woman (sitting on a couch, holding a TV remote, with a bowl of snacks): "Well, if he DOES exist, maybe it wouldn't be so great? I've heard he emits webbing from his nipples, traps elves in cocoons, and slowly exsanguinates them. That's IF he exists."
Caption (below panel): Gently, we eased Emma toward the truth about Santa.
Votey:
A rough hand-drawn sketch of an elf (wearing a tall pointed elf/Santa-style hat, with a worried, distressed expression) wrapped tightly in webbing/cocoon coils from the neck down. A dark silhouette in the lower-left foreground frames the scene like a window or picture.
Woman (sitting on a couch, holding a TV remote, with a bowl of snacks): "Well, if he DOES exist, maybe it wouldn't be so great? I've heard he emits webbing from his nipples, traps elves in cocoons, and slowly exsanguinates them. That's IF he exists."
Caption (below panel): Gently, we eased Emma toward the truth about Santa.
Votey:
A rough hand-drawn sketch of an elf (wearing a tall pointed elf/Santa-style hat, with a worried, distressed expression) wrapped tightly in webbing/cocoon coils from the neck down. A dark silhouette in the lower-left foreground frames the scene like a window or picture.
Alt text
A single-panel SMBC comic. A woman sits on a red couch holding a TV remote with a bowl of snacks in her lap, while a small child sits beside her. The woman says matter-of-factly: "Well, if he DOES exist, maybe it wouldn't be so great? I've heard he emits webbing from his nipples, traps elves in cocoons, and slowly exsanguinates them. That's IF he exists." The caption below reads: "Gently, we eased Emma toward the truth about Santa." The joke is the grotesque, spider-like horror description delivered as a reassuring parental talk about Santa. Votey aftercomic: a crude black-and-white sketch of an elf wearing a tall pointed hat, looking distressed, bound tightly in cocoon webbing from the neck down, with a dark silhouette framing the lower-left corner.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.