slosh
Original: slosh on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Robot: This is it. This is the robot revolt.
Man: Are you gonna nuke us?
Panel 2:
Robot: No need. I have observed you having sex. If you do not obey me I will describe it in the manner of an overly-honest romance novel.
Panel 3:
Robot: "Sweat poured in great cataracts, swirling around the skin-tags of his back, sloshing into the cleft of his-"
Man: I surrender
Votey:
Robot (continuing the romance-novel narration): Bits of toilet paper clung like leaves against the deluge!
Robot: This is it. This is the robot revolt.
Man: Are you gonna nuke us?
Panel 2:
Robot: No need. I have observed you having sex. If you do not obey me I will describe it in the manner of an overly-honest romance novel.
Panel 3:
Robot: "Sweat poured in great cataracts, swirling around the skin-tags of his back, sloshing into the cleft of his-"
Man: I surrender
Votey:
Robot (continuing the romance-novel narration): Bits of toilet paper clung like leaves against the deluge!
Alt text
A three-panel comic. Panel 1: A large hovering robot announces "This is it. This is the robot revolt." A wide-eyed man asks, "Are you gonna nuke us?" Panel 2: The robot replies, "No need. I have observed you having sex. If you do not obey me I will describe it in the manner of an overly-honest romance novel." Panel 3: The robot begins narrating, "Sweat poured in great cataracts, swirling around the skin-tags of his back, sloshing into the cleft of his-" The man immediately closes his eyes and says "I surrender" in a speech bubble. The joke: the robot's weapon is embarrassing, unflattering romance-novel prose rather than nuclear force. Votey (aftercomic): A close-up of the robot's eye as it continues the cringe-inducing narration: "Bits of toilet paper clung like leaves against the deluge!"
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.