absent
Original: absent on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Student: Professor, why are you so absent-minded? Is it something about higher mathematics?
Professor: Consider three cases.
Panel 2:
Professor: In case one, when you fail to wear pants you are chastised. Do you wear pants?
Panel 3:
Professor: In case two, when you fail to wear pants, nobody notices. Do you wear pants?
Panel 4:
Student: Yes.
Panel 5:
Professor: Most of the time, I would think.
Panel 6:
Professor: In case three, every time you forget to wear pants, people whisper about how brilliant you are. Do you ever wear pants?
Panel 7:
Student: No. By God no. Never.
Panel 8:
Professor: Q.E.D.
Votey:
(No text. Close-up of the professor's lower torso, revealing he is not wearing pants — his crotch is censored with a pixelated/blurred block beneath his green sweater vest.)
Student: Professor, why are you so absent-minded? Is it something about higher mathematics?
Professor: Consider three cases.
Panel 2:
Professor: In case one, when you fail to wear pants you are chastised. Do you wear pants?
Panel 3:
Professor: In case two, when you fail to wear pants, nobody notices. Do you wear pants?
Panel 4:
Student: Yes.
Panel 5:
Professor: Most of the time, I would think.
Panel 6:
Professor: In case three, every time you forget to wear pants, people whisper about how brilliant you are. Do you ever wear pants?
Panel 7:
Student: No. By God no. Never.
Panel 8:
Professor: Q.E.D.
Votey:
(No text. Close-up of the professor's lower torso, revealing he is not wearing pants — his crotch is censored with a pixelated/blurred block beneath his green sweater vest.)
Alt text
An eight-panel SMBC comic. A young student with brown hair and a green shirt asks an older gray-haired professor in glasses and a green sweater vest, "Professor, why are you so absent-minded? Is it something about higher mathematics?" The professor replies, "Consider three cases." He lays out a proof: "In case one, when you fail to wear pants you are chastised. Do you wear pants?" The student answers "Yes." "In case two, when you fail to wear pants, nobody notices. Do you wear pants?" — "Most of the time, I would think," the professor muses. "In case three, every time you forget to wear pants, people whisper about how brilliant you are. Do you ever wear pants?" The student answers, "No. By God no. Never." In the final panel the professor stands triumphantly with hands on hips and declares, "Q.E.D." — having proven his absent-mindedness is rational. The votey is a close-up of the professor's lower body confirming the punchline: he is indeed wearing no pants, with his crotch censored by a pixelated block below his sweater vest.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.