heartbreak
Original: heartbreak on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A red-haired man holds a phone to his ear, pleading.
Man (on phone): BUT SALLY, I CAN CHANGE! PLEASE DON'T HANG UP! PLEASE, I LOVE--
Sound effect from phone: click!
Panel 2: The man sits alone in darkness, looking shocked, having been hung up on.
Panel 3: A wide dark panel with a glowing pink gradient of light beginning to appear.
Panel 4: A small blue winged fairy appears before the man.
Man: WHO ARE YOU?
Fairy: I'M THE HEARTBREAK FAIRY!
Panel 5: The fairy hovers, holding a large stinger/dagger.
Man: THAT'S A BIG STINGER YOU GOT THERE.
Fairy: IT'S TO STAB YOU RIGHT IN THE CHEST!
Panel 6: The man looks downcast at the little fairy.
Man: BUT...
Fairy: DON'T WORRY! IT'LL NEVER HEAL!
Panel 7: The fairy lunges forward to stab the man.
Man: WHY IS THAT GOOD?
Fairy: CAN'T BREAK WHAT'S ALREADY BROKEN!
Votey:
A man in a t-shirt with a jagged star design stands looking shaken.
Man: Jeepers.
Man (on phone): BUT SALLY, I CAN CHANGE! PLEASE DON'T HANG UP! PLEASE, I LOVE--
Sound effect from phone: click!
Panel 2: The man sits alone in darkness, looking shocked, having been hung up on.
Panel 3: A wide dark panel with a glowing pink gradient of light beginning to appear.
Panel 4: A small blue winged fairy appears before the man.
Man: WHO ARE YOU?
Fairy: I'M THE HEARTBREAK FAIRY!
Panel 5: The fairy hovers, holding a large stinger/dagger.
Man: THAT'S A BIG STINGER YOU GOT THERE.
Fairy: IT'S TO STAB YOU RIGHT IN THE CHEST!
Panel 6: The man looks downcast at the little fairy.
Man: BUT...
Fairy: DON'T WORRY! IT'LL NEVER HEAL!
Panel 7: The fairy lunges forward to stab the man.
Man: WHY IS THAT GOOD?
Fairy: CAN'T BREAK WHAT'S ALREADY BROKEN!
Votey:
A man in a t-shirt with a jagged star design stands looking shaken.
Man: Jeepers.
Alt text
An SMBC comic. A red-haired man on the phone begs his partner: "But Sally, I can change! Please don't hang up! Please, I love--" The phone goes "click!" as she hangs up. He sits alone in darkness, shocked. A glowing light appears and a tiny blue winged fairy materializes. "Who are you?" he asks. "I'm the Heartbreak Fairy!" she says, brandishing an oversized stinger. He notes, "That's a big stinger you got there," and she replies, "It's to stab you right in the chest!" "But..." he says. "Don't worry! It'll never heal!" she chirps, lunging at him. "Why is that good?" he asks. "Can't break what's already broken!" she answers as she strikes. Votey: a man in a star-print shirt stands looking shaken and says, "Jeepers."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.