math
Original: math on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Woman: Part of why math confuses people is that we pick stupid names for things.
Panel 2:
Woman: Imaginary numbers? They're not "imaginary"! They're actual things that show up in lots of practical equations!
Panel 3:
Woman: Why do we have "natural" numbers when all sorts of things naturally don't come in positive integer values? Is half of something unnatural? Is pi unnatural?
Panel 4:
Man (off-panel): So you think we should adopt more descriptive terms?
Woman: NO.
Panel 5:
Woman: I think if we're going to use bad terminology we should stop half-assing it.
Panel 6:
Woman: My proposal: Natural numbers will be called "boring numbers." Imaginary numbers should be called "bullshit numbers."
Panel 7:
Woman: Complex numbers should be called "boring bullshit numbers." Hyperreals will be called "big-ass numbers," and irrational numbers will be called "those flockin' things."
Panel 8:
Woman: Consider the utility here! New categories are now easy to remember, and you can use phrases like "As a platonist I believe in the real existence of bullshit numbers."
Panel 9:
Man (off-panel): Have you created anything interesting or just recategorized known concepts?
Woman: That is a matter for philosophers!
Votey:
Woman (speech bubble): Also, numbers should be called count-squiggles.
Woman: Part of why math confuses people is that we pick stupid names for things.
Panel 2:
Woman: Imaginary numbers? They're not "imaginary"! They're actual things that show up in lots of practical equations!
Panel 3:
Woman: Why do we have "natural" numbers when all sorts of things naturally don't come in positive integer values? Is half of something unnatural? Is pi unnatural?
Panel 4:
Man (off-panel): So you think we should adopt more descriptive terms?
Woman: NO.
Panel 5:
Woman: I think if we're going to use bad terminology we should stop half-assing it.
Panel 6:
Woman: My proposal: Natural numbers will be called "boring numbers." Imaginary numbers should be called "bullshit numbers."
Panel 7:
Woman: Complex numbers should be called "boring bullshit numbers." Hyperreals will be called "big-ass numbers," and irrational numbers will be called "those flockin' things."
Panel 8:
Woman: Consider the utility here! New categories are now easy to remember, and you can use phrases like "As a platonist I believe in the real existence of bullshit numbers."
Panel 9:
Man (off-panel): Have you created anything interesting or just recategorized known concepts?
Woman: That is a matter for philosophers!
Votey:
Woman (speech bubble): Also, numbers should be called count-squiggles.
Alt text
A nine-panel SMBC comic in which a woman delivers a monologue arguing that math has badly chosen names for things. She complains that "imaginary" numbers aren't really imaginary since they appear in practical equations, and that "natural" numbers are a misnomer because things like a half or pi naturally exist too. When an off-panel man asks if she wants more descriptive terms, she emphatically says "NO." Instead, she proposes leaning into bad terminology: natural numbers should be "boring numbers," imaginary numbers "bullshit numbers," complex numbers "boring bullshit numbers," hyperreals "big-ass numbers," and irrational numbers "those flockin' things." She touts the utility, suggesting phrases like "As a platonist I believe in the real existence of bullshit numbers." The man asks whether she actually created anything interesting or just renamed known concepts, and she dodges: "That is a matter for philosophers!" In the votey aftercomic, a close-up of her face as she adds via speech bubble: "Also, numbers should be called count-squiggles."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.