on-cheese-platters
Original: on-cheese-platters on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A blonde woman in a red dress holds out a tray of fancy cheese.
Blonde woman: "AND A TRAY OF FANCY CHEESE? WHAT A PARTY, CHERYL! YOU'RE SO HOSPITABLE!"
Panel 2: Close on the blonde woman, now looking serious.
Blonde woman: "I GREW UP IN A HIGH RESOURCE ENVIRONMENT. NECESSITIES, LIKE FOOD AND SHELTER WERE NOT THE BATTLEFIELD FOR HOUSEHOLD COMPETITION."
Panel 3: The blonde woman continues, frowning.
Blonde woman: "THUS, THE PRIMARY LOCUS OF STRIFE WAS THE BATTLE FOR SOCIAL STATUS VIA THE EXPENDITURE OF PERSONAL RESOURCES."
Panel 4: A brown-haired woman in a yellow dress (Cheryl) appears in the foreground; the blonde woman faces her, scowling.
Blonde woman: "CHILDREN OF AFFLUENCE DO NOT FEAR TO GIVE. WE FEAR TO RECEIVE."
Panel 5: Cheryl, brown-haired in the yellow dress, stands holding a martini glass, looking uneasy.
Panel 6: The blonde woman thrusts the loaded cheese platter toward Cheryl.
Blonde woman: "HENCE THIS CHEESE PLATTER!"
Cheryl: "YOU KNOW WHAT ACTUALLY I'M FULL!"
Votey:
A simple black-and-white drawing of a smug face. Bold hand-lettered text above and beside it reads: "EAT MY CHEESE"
Blonde woman: "AND A TRAY OF FANCY CHEESE? WHAT A PARTY, CHERYL! YOU'RE SO HOSPITABLE!"
Panel 2: Close on the blonde woman, now looking serious.
Blonde woman: "I GREW UP IN A HIGH RESOURCE ENVIRONMENT. NECESSITIES, LIKE FOOD AND SHELTER WERE NOT THE BATTLEFIELD FOR HOUSEHOLD COMPETITION."
Panel 3: The blonde woman continues, frowning.
Blonde woman: "THUS, THE PRIMARY LOCUS OF STRIFE WAS THE BATTLE FOR SOCIAL STATUS VIA THE EXPENDITURE OF PERSONAL RESOURCES."
Panel 4: A brown-haired woman in a yellow dress (Cheryl) appears in the foreground; the blonde woman faces her, scowling.
Blonde woman: "CHILDREN OF AFFLUENCE DO NOT FEAR TO GIVE. WE FEAR TO RECEIVE."
Panel 5: Cheryl, brown-haired in the yellow dress, stands holding a martini glass, looking uneasy.
Panel 6: The blonde woman thrusts the loaded cheese platter toward Cheryl.
Blonde woman: "HENCE THIS CHEESE PLATTER!"
Cheryl: "YOU KNOW WHAT ACTUALLY I'M FULL!"
Votey:
A simple black-and-white drawing of a smug face. Bold hand-lettered text above and beside it reads: "EAT MY CHEESE"
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic at a party. A blonde woman in a red dress holds out a tray of fancy cheese and gushes, "And a tray of fancy cheese? What a party, Cheryl! You're so hospitable!" She then launches into a deadpan monologue: "I grew up in a high resource environment. Necessities, like food and shelter were not the battlefield for household competition. Thus, the primary locus of strife was the battle for social status via the expenditure of personal resources." Facing Cheryl, a brown-haired woman in a yellow dress holding a martini, she scowls: "Children of affluence do not fear to give. We fear to receive." In the final panel she shoves the cheese platter at Cheryl, declaring "Hence this cheese platter!" Cheryl, now visibly uncomfortable, deflects: "You know what, actually I'm full!" The joke: an over-intellectualized justification for being pushy makes a simple offer of cheese aggressively unappealing. Votey: a crude black-and-white smug face with bold lettering reading "EAT MY CHEESE."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.