my-life-is-ruined
Original: my-life-is-ruined on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Man (with reddish hair, distressed, hand on his head): OH MY GOD MY LIFE IS RUINED! I COULD'VE BEEN IN THE BIG LEAGUE! NOW I KNOCKED UP SOME MIDDLE-AGED MATRON! THIS IS A NIGHTMARE!
Caption (below panel): Six months ago, we erotically roleplayed a cheerleader-quarterback scenario, and my husband got stuck.
Votey:
Woman (close-up, stern expression): YOU ARE NOT TO GO ANYWHERE NEAR A HIGH SCHOOL.
Man (with reddish hair, distressed, hand on his head): OH MY GOD MY LIFE IS RUINED! I COULD'VE BEEN IN THE BIG LEAGUE! NOW I KNOCKED UP SOME MIDDLE-AGED MATRON! THIS IS A NIGHTMARE!
Caption (below panel): Six months ago, we erotically roleplayed a cheerleader-quarterback scenario, and my husband got stuck.
Votey:
Woman (close-up, stern expression): YOU ARE NOT TO GO ANYWHERE NEAR A HIGH SCHOOL.
Alt text
A panicked young man with reddish hair clutches his head and shouts at a brown-haired woman who is turned away from the viewer: "Oh my god my life is ruined! I could've been in the big league! Now I knocked up some middle-aged matron! This is a nightmare!" The caption beneath reads: "Six months ago, we erotically roleplayed a cheerleader-quarterback scenario, and my husband got stuck" — implying the man is the woman's husband, mentally trapped in the persona of a teenage quarterback. Votey (aftercomic): a close-up of the woman's stern, irritated face as she warns, "You are not to go anywhere near a high school."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.