being-a-dad

A balding, red-haired man in sunglasses and a blue shirt leans excitedly toward a computer monitor while his teenage daughter stands beside him cringing in embarrassment. The father gushes, "WHOA. LOOK AT HIS NEARLY-SYMMETRICAL BODY, FINE MOTOR-CONTROL, AND BLEMISH-FREE FACE!" and "HIS SPERM QUALITY MUST BE OFF THE CHARTS!" The daughter protests, "DAD, STOP. DAD!" A caption beneath the panel reads: "I can't wait until my daughter is into boy bands." The joke: a father evaluating his daughter's celebrity crush like a clinical breeding prospect rather than a heartthrob. Votey: a close-up of a smug, confident male face saying, "SEEYA IN TWELVE YEARS, KID" — implying the idol is biding his time until the daughter is of age.