monocle-announcement
Original: monocle-announcement on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Top banner (yellow): HEY GEEKS! THIS IS AN AD FOR A NEW (AND AWESOME) PROJECT. CLICK TO SEE/ TO LOVE FUN. YOU TO LOOK AT IT. BUT IF YOU'RE NOT INTERESTED, ENJOY TODAY'S TWO NEW COMICS, BY PRESSING "2".
Panel 1: FOUR YEARS AGO, ZACH WEINERSMITH HAD AN IDEA.
Zach (man with reddish hair, holding an object): WHAT IF THERE WAS, LIKE, A MONOCLE IN YOU KNOW, A LITTLE WRAPPER. SO IT LOOKS LIKE A CONDOM?
Panel 2: FORCES WERE ARRAYED AGAINST HIM.
Woman: THIS IS STUPID. LIKE... WEAPONS-GRADE STUPID. LIKE, IF STUPID WERE ARCHITECTURE, THIS WOULD BE THE PARTHENON.
Panel 3: BUT WEINERSMITH PERSEVERED.
Zach: YOU KNOW HOW MUCH MONEY TO GET THESE MADE?
Woman: I SEE YOU'VE NEVER HEARD OF INVESTING.
Panel 4: AND ONE DAY... A GLORIOUS PROTOTYPE WAS COMPLETED. (shown: a foil-wrapped packet labeled with text)
Narration: NOW, NOBODY WILL EVER HAVE TO SUFFER FROM A TEMPORARY LACK OF CLASSINESS.
Panel 5: PLEASE DO YOUR PART TO MAKE ME RIGHT AND MY WIFE WRONG. JUST... CLICK THIS COMIC! (shown: an opened wrapper with a monocle inside)
Zach (in suit, gesturing): IF THIS IS SUCCESSFUL, THE WORLD IS BROKED.
Votey: A close-up line drawing of two faces pressed cheek to cheek — a clean-shaven face with closed, content eyes beside a bearded, smiling face wearing a monocle, both looking pleased and classy.
Panel 1: FOUR YEARS AGO, ZACH WEINERSMITH HAD AN IDEA.
Zach (man with reddish hair, holding an object): WHAT IF THERE WAS, LIKE, A MONOCLE IN YOU KNOW, A LITTLE WRAPPER. SO IT LOOKS LIKE A CONDOM?
Panel 2: FORCES WERE ARRAYED AGAINST HIM.
Woman: THIS IS STUPID. LIKE... WEAPONS-GRADE STUPID. LIKE, IF STUPID WERE ARCHITECTURE, THIS WOULD BE THE PARTHENON.
Panel 3: BUT WEINERSMITH PERSEVERED.
Zach: YOU KNOW HOW MUCH MONEY TO GET THESE MADE?
Woman: I SEE YOU'VE NEVER HEARD OF INVESTING.
Panel 4: AND ONE DAY... A GLORIOUS PROTOTYPE WAS COMPLETED. (shown: a foil-wrapped packet labeled with text)
Narration: NOW, NOBODY WILL EVER HAVE TO SUFFER FROM A TEMPORARY LACK OF CLASSINESS.
Panel 5: PLEASE DO YOUR PART TO MAKE ME RIGHT AND MY WIFE WRONG. JUST... CLICK THIS COMIC! (shown: an opened wrapper with a monocle inside)
Zach (in suit, gesturing): IF THIS IS SUCCESSFUL, THE WORLD IS BROKED.
Votey: A close-up line drawing of two faces pressed cheek to cheek — a clean-shaven face with closed, content eyes beside a bearded, smiling face wearing a monocle, both looking pleased and classy.
Alt text
A SMBC comic with a yellow ad banner across the top reading: "Hey geeks! This is an ad for a new (and awesome) project. Click to see it, but if you're not interested, enjoy today's two new comics by pressing 2." Panel 1, captioned "Four years ago, Zach Weinersmith had an idea," shows a red-haired man saying, "What if there was, like, a monocle in a little wrapper, so it looks like a condom?" Panel 2, "Forces were arrayed against him," shows a woman replying, "This is stupid. Like weapons-grade stupid. Like, if stupid were architecture, this would be the Parthenon." Panel 3, "But Weinersmith persevered," the man asks, "You know how much money to get these made?" and she answers, "I see you've never heard of investing." Panel 4, "And one day a glorious prototype was completed," shows a foil-wrapped packet, with narration: "Now, nobody will ever have to suffer from a temporary lack of classiness." Panel 5 shows an opened wrapper revealing a monocle inside; the man, now in a suit, pleads, "Please do your part to make me right and my wife wrong. Just click this comic! If this is successful, the world is broked." The votey is a close-up line drawing of two faces cheek to cheek: a content clean-shaven face beside a smiling bearded face wearing the monocle, both looking smugly classy.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.