2014-12-18
Original: 2014-12-18 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A child stands in a snowy yard beside a small snowman, looking up at the sky.
Child: I WISH MY SNOWMAN WERE ALIVE!
Panel 2: A full-sized snowman with a top hat, carrot nose, and stick arms now stands in the yard, alive.
Snowman: I'M ALIVE!
Panel 3: The child (now shown as a young person) recoils in shock.
Child: WHAT THE--
Panel 4: The snowman speaks, dawning realization on its face.
Snowman: WHO... WHAT... I'M... I'M A MIND. IN A BODY. MADE OF ICE?
Panel 5: Close on the snowman, beginning to panic.
Snowman: YOU MADE ME OUT OF ICE. YOU SHIT. I CAN FEEL MYSELF COMING APART!!
Panel 6: The snowman rants, increasingly frantic.
Snowman: WHYYY? SO I CAN WATCH MYSELF DIE? IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT? IT'S NOT ENOUGH TO DESTROY SOMETHING -- THE THING HAS TO WATCH ITS OWN DESTRUCTION!!
Panel 7: The snowman screams in horror at the child.
Snowman: OH GOD I'M MELTING! YOU MADE THIS HAPPEN! YOU!
Panel 8 (caption: SOON...): An adult woman opens a freezer in a kitchen; a man stands behind her.
Woman: BOBBY, WHY DID YOU TAKE EVERYTHING OUT OF THE FREEZER?
Panel 9: Inside the freezer sits the snowman's head, content.
Snowman head: FROSTY LIVES HERE NOW!
Votey:
A large angry snowman face fills the panel, glaring.
Snowman: CLOSE THE DOOOOR.
Child: I WISH MY SNOWMAN WERE ALIVE!
Panel 2: A full-sized snowman with a top hat, carrot nose, and stick arms now stands in the yard, alive.
Snowman: I'M ALIVE!
Panel 3: The child (now shown as a young person) recoils in shock.
Child: WHAT THE--
Panel 4: The snowman speaks, dawning realization on its face.
Snowman: WHO... WHAT... I'M... I'M A MIND. IN A BODY. MADE OF ICE?
Panel 5: Close on the snowman, beginning to panic.
Snowman: YOU MADE ME OUT OF ICE. YOU SHIT. I CAN FEEL MYSELF COMING APART!!
Panel 6: The snowman rants, increasingly frantic.
Snowman: WHYYY? SO I CAN WATCH MYSELF DIE? IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT? IT'S NOT ENOUGH TO DESTROY SOMETHING -- THE THING HAS TO WATCH ITS OWN DESTRUCTION!!
Panel 7: The snowman screams in horror at the child.
Snowman: OH GOD I'M MELTING! YOU MADE THIS HAPPEN! YOU!
Panel 8 (caption: SOON...): An adult woman opens a freezer in a kitchen; a man stands behind her.
Woman: BOBBY, WHY DID YOU TAKE EVERYTHING OUT OF THE FREEZER?
Panel 9: Inside the freezer sits the snowman's head, content.
Snowman head: FROSTY LIVES HERE NOW!
Votey:
A large angry snowman face fills the panel, glaring.
Snowman: CLOSE THE DOOOOR.
Alt text
A nine-panel SMBC comic. A child in a snowy yard wishes their snowman were alive ("I WISH MY SNOWMAN WERE ALIVE!"). It comes to life ("I'M ALIVE!") but immediately spirals into existential horror upon realizing it is a conscious mind trapped in a melting body of ice: "I'M A MIND. IN A BODY. MADE OF ICE?"... "YOU MADE ME OUT OF ICE... I CAN FEEL MYSELF COMING APART!!"... "IT'S NOT ENOUGH TO DESTROY SOMETHING -- THE THING HAS TO WATCH ITS OWN DESTRUCTION!!"... "OH GOD I'M MELTING! YOU MADE THIS HAPPEN! YOU!" Caption "SOON...": a woman opens a kitchen freezer and asks "BOBBY, WHY DID YOU TAKE EVERYTHING OUT OF THE FREEZER?" Inside sits the snowman's severed head, happily declaring "FROSTY LIVES HERE NOW!" Votey: a close-up of the snowman's huge angry face glaring out, growling "CLOSE THE DOOOOR."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.