2014-12-14
Original: 2014-12-14 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Man (with mustache, explaining to a small child): Well, they live in caves and sewers, so over time they've evolved to have very little skin pigmentation.
Panel 2:
Man: In the absence of light, their eyes have become less useful, so they developed big noses.
Man: They evolved big bodies for a low center of gravity, and they have long feet, which helps on the slippery surfaces of their underground homes.
Panel 3:
Man: Interestingly, they have also developed large lips, perhaps to sense nearby fish or small mammals upon which they prey.
Man: You'll note they really only came out when small high-calorie animals are herding.
Panel 4:
Child: But the makeup and hair come off, don't they?
Man: That's called "moulting."
Votey:
(No dialogue. A clown's face, drawn upside-down, with white skin, green hair, a red nose, and an open mouth showing teeth, against a dark blue background with red and white shapes.)
Man (with mustache, explaining to a small child): Well, they live in caves and sewers, so over time they've evolved to have very little skin pigmentation.
Panel 2:
Man: In the absence of light, their eyes have become less useful, so they developed big noses.
Man: They evolved big bodies for a low center of gravity, and they have long feet, which helps on the slippery surfaces of their underground homes.
Panel 3:
Man: Interestingly, they have also developed large lips, perhaps to sense nearby fish or small mammals upon which they prey.
Man: You'll note they really only came out when small high-calorie animals are herding.
Panel 4:
Child: But the makeup and hair come off, don't they?
Man: That's called "moulting."
Votey:
(No dialogue. A clown's face, drawn upside-down, with white skin, green hair, a red nose, and an open mouth showing teeth, against a dark blue background with red and white shapes.)
Alt text
A four-panel comic. A mustached man calmly explains to a small child the supposed evolutionary biology of a creature: it lives in caves and sewers so it lost skin pigmentation; its eyes became less useful in darkness so it developed a big nose; it has a big body for a low center of gravity and long feet for slippery underground surfaces; it has large lips to sense prey; and it emerges when 'small high-calorie animals are herding.' The deadpan description is actually describing a circus clown. In the final panel the child asks, 'But the makeup and hair come off, don't they?' and the man replies, 'That's called "moulting."' Votey (aftercomic): a close-up of a clown's face shown upside-down, white skin, green hair, red nose, and an open mouth full of teeth against a dark blue background, looking alarmed.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.