2014-11-17
Original: 2014-11-17 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Alien (green, large-headed): It must be strange for you to meet us. We live for over a thousand years, while you live for only sixteen hours.
Panel 2:
Woman (brown hair): That's not true. We live for much longer. Up to 70 years.
Panel 3:
Alien: Your bodies do, yes. But life is the persistence of consciousness, and you cease to be conscious for eight hours every day.
Panel 4:
Woman: That's just sleep.
Panel 5:
Alien: Eight! Sleep! All sapient species view sleep because persistence of consciousness is maladaptive in most environments.
Panel 6:
Alien: That's way advanced being cube sleep so only our consciousness will cease inhabit my body, whereas your body will house about 30,000 by the time your body dies.
Woman: ...
Panel 7:
Alien: Oh! Speaking of this, I have to get to a meeting. Today I have to host, and make sure to enjoy the golden minutes of your life!
Woman: ...
Panel 8:
Caption: LATER
(Woman lying in bed under a blanket.)
Votey:
Caption: STILL LATER...
(Close-up of the alien lying down, smiling contentedly, with a speech bubble reading "ZZZ...")
Alien (green, large-headed): It must be strange for you to meet us. We live for over a thousand years, while you live for only sixteen hours.
Panel 2:
Woman (brown hair): That's not true. We live for much longer. Up to 70 years.
Panel 3:
Alien: Your bodies do, yes. But life is the persistence of consciousness, and you cease to be conscious for eight hours every day.
Panel 4:
Woman: That's just sleep.
Panel 5:
Alien: Eight! Sleep! All sapient species view sleep because persistence of consciousness is maladaptive in most environments.
Panel 6:
Alien: That's way advanced being cube sleep so only our consciousness will cease inhabit my body, whereas your body will house about 30,000 by the time your body dies.
Woman: ...
Panel 7:
Alien: Oh! Speaking of this, I have to get to a meeting. Today I have to host, and make sure to enjoy the golden minutes of your life!
Woman: ...
Panel 8:
Caption: LATER
(Woman lying in bed under a blanket.)
Votey:
Caption: STILL LATER...
(Close-up of the alien lying down, smiling contentedly, with a speech bubble reading "ZZZ...")
Alt text
An eight-panel SMBC comic. A green big-headed alien talks with a brown-haired woman. The alien says it's strange to meet her because aliens live over a thousand years while she lives only sixteen hours. She objects that humans live up to 70 years. The alien argues that life is the persistence of consciousness, and since humans lose consciousness for eight hours of sleep every day, they barely live. It claims all sapient species avoid sleep because losing consciousness is maladaptive, boasting that aliens cube-sleep so their single consciousness persists while a human body cycles through many. Overwhelmed, the woman just stares silently. The alien cheerfully excuses itself for a meeting and tells her to enjoy the golden minutes of her life. Final panel, captioned LATER, shows the woman lying awake in bed. Votey (aftercomic), captioned STILL LATER, shows a close-up of the alien lying down, smiling blissfully and snoring with a 'ZZZ...' bubble, having fallen asleep itself.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.