2012-12-22
Original: 2012-12-22 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Patient: TELL IT TO ME STRAIGHT, DOC! I HAVE ASPERGER'S SYNDROME, RIGHT? THAT'S WHY WHEN THAT GIRL TOLD ME I WAS HANDSOME, I SCOWLED AT HER.
Doctor: NO. NO, YOU'RE AWARE THAT YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE THAT. YOU HAVE A MUCH WORSE CONDITION.
Caption below panel:
Assburger's Syndrome: The belief that a self-diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome entitles you to be an asshole.
Votey:
A roughly sketched figure (drawn in a loose, scribbly style) gestures and says: MAYBE SOMEONE WHO LIVES IN A GROSS OFFICE, DRAWING CARTOONS NAKED SHOULDN'T JUDGE—
The figure being addressed cuts in: GR-R-Rgh—
Patient: TELL IT TO ME STRAIGHT, DOC! I HAVE ASPERGER'S SYNDROME, RIGHT? THAT'S WHY WHEN THAT GIRL TOLD ME I WAS HANDSOME, I SCOWLED AT HER.
Doctor: NO. NO, YOU'RE AWARE THAT YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE THAT. YOU HAVE A MUCH WORSE CONDITION.
Caption below panel:
Assburger's Syndrome: The belief that a self-diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome entitles you to be an asshole.
Votey:
A roughly sketched figure (drawn in a loose, scribbly style) gestures and says: MAYBE SOMEONE WHO LIVES IN A GROSS OFFICE, DRAWING CARTOONS NAKED SHOULDN'T JUDGE—
The figure being addressed cuts in: GR-R-Rgh—
Alt text
Main comic, single panel: A balding doctor with glasses, wearing a green shirt and holding a tablet, sits across from a patient (a person with dark hair in a yellow shirt, seen from behind). The patient says, 'Tell it to me straight, Doc! I have Asperger's Syndrome, right? That's why when that girl told me I was handsome, I scowled at her.' The doctor replies, 'No. No, you're aware that you shouldn't have done that. You have a MUCH worse condition.' A caption beneath the panel reads: 'Assburger's Syndrome: The belief that a self-diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome entitles you to be an asshole.'
Votey (aftercomic), drawn in a loose hand-sketched style: A roughly drawn figure points and protests, 'Maybe someone who lives in a gross office, drawing cartoons naked shouldn't judge—' breaking the fourth wall to taunt the cartoonist. The other figure cuts in with an angry growl, 'GR-R-Rgh—'
Votey (aftercomic), drawn in a loose hand-sketched style: A roughly drawn figure points and protests, 'Maybe someone who lives in a gross office, drawing cartoons naked shouldn't judge—' breaking the fourth wall to taunt the cartoonist. The other figure cuts in with an angry growl, 'GR-R-Rgh—'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.