2012-12-26
Original: 2012-12-26 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
A uniformed man wearing a peaked cap (a police officer or detective), seen from behind, holds out a rolled document toward a man with long reddish-blond hair and a beard wearing a purple button-up shirt.
Officer: ACCORDING TO OUR FORENSIC ANALYSIS, IT WAS YOUR UNCLE CLAUDIUS WITH 100% CERTAINTY.
Bearded man: Ah.
Caption (below panel): The revised Hamlet was about 1/10th as long as the original.
Votey:
Title banner at top of panel: ROMEO AND JULIET
A uniformed officer (the same kind of peaked-cap policeman, drawn in a rough sketch style) looks up toward a much taller figure whose body looms above, out of frame.
Officer: SHE'S 13, SIR.
A uniformed man wearing a peaked cap (a police officer or detective), seen from behind, holds out a rolled document toward a man with long reddish-blond hair and a beard wearing a purple button-up shirt.
Officer: ACCORDING TO OUR FORENSIC ANALYSIS, IT WAS YOUR UNCLE CLAUDIUS WITH 100% CERTAINTY.
Bearded man: Ah.
Caption (below panel): The revised Hamlet was about 1/10th as long as the original.
Votey:
Title banner at top of panel: ROMEO AND JULIET
A uniformed officer (the same kind of peaked-cap policeman, drawn in a rough sketch style) looks up toward a much taller figure whose body looms above, out of frame.
Officer: SHE'S 13, SIR.
Alt text
Main comic: A single panel showing a peaked-cap police officer, seen from behind, handing a rolled document to a long-haired bearded man in a purple shirt, who stands against a green background. The officer says, "According to our forensic analysis, it was your uncle Claudius with 100% certainty." The bearded man (implied to be Hamlet) simply replies, "Ah." A caption beneath reads: "The revised Hamlet was about 1/10th as long as the original." The joke: modern forensics would solve the mystery instantly, collapsing the whole play. Votey: A rough black-and-white panel titled "ROMEO AND JULIET." A peaked-cap officer looks up at a towering figure whose body extends out of frame, and says, "She's 13, sir." The joke: applying the same investigative shortcut to Romeo and Juliet ends the story immediately by flagging Juliet's age.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.