ohyesrobot.ordoliberal.com

2012-10-27

Original: 2012-10-27 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal

Transcript

Panel 1:
Man: I have a tiny penis.
Woman: Hm?

Panel 2:
Woman: That's your pickup line?

Panel 3:
Man: It's so tiny, it affected my body image, forcing me to spend every spare moment mastering the sensual arts.

Panel 4:
Man: I have more anatomic knowledge than a doctor, more knowledge of your nerves than a neurologist, more erotic expertise than a gigolo. I know every inch of your body already by touch. By smell. By taste.

Panel 5:
Man: Oh, there are other men in this bar with tiny penises...

Panel 6:
Man: But none so tiny, so thimble-like, as mine.

Panel 7:
Man: When Shakespeare said "sweet are the uses of adversity..."

Panel 8:
Man: He was talking about my wiener.
Woman: Take me now.

Votey:
The man and woman lie together in bed afterward. The man, smiling contentedly, thinks: GOD, I'M CLEVER.

Alt text

A black-and-white-bordered, full-color comic set in a dimly lit bar. A dark-haired man in a blazer chats up a red-haired woman. Panel 1: He opens with "I have a tiny penis." She replies, "Hm?" Panel 2: She asks, "That's your pickup line?" Panel 3: He explains, "It's so tiny, it affected my body image, forcing me to spend every spare moment mastering the sensual arts." Panel 4: "I have more anatomic knowledge than a doctor, more knowledge of your nerves than a neurologist, more erotic expertise than a gigolo. I know every inch of your body already by touch. By smell. By taste." Panel 5: "Oh, there are other men in this bar with tiny penises..." Panel 6: "But none so tiny, so thimble-like, as mine." Panel 7: "When Shakespeare said 'sweet are the uses of adversity...'" Panel 8: Leaning in close, "He was talking about my wiener." The won-over woman whispers, "Take me now." Votey: The couple lie together in bed afterward; the man smiles and thinks smugly, "GOD, I'M CLEVER."

Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.