2010-09-24
Original: 2010-09-24 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A giant robot, piloted by a man visible in a porthole window in its head, looms over a city. The pilot speaks.
Pilot: Oh hey, Sandy. Remember me? You wouldn't be my high school prom date, but now I'm back, with a GIANT ROBOT. Bet you regret rejecting me now!
Panel 2: A blonde woman (Sandy) stands looking up.
Panel 3: A close interior shot. Sandy stands beside a man with a calm expression.
Sandy: Sorry, I'm married now. To the guy who wedgied you every day in high school.
Man: Heya.
Panel 4: A burst sound effect as something crashes down.
SFX: SKLOOSH!
Panel 5: Sandy, now looking delighted.
Sandy: Great! Now we can be together!
Panel 6: Sandy stands small at the base of a huge metallic structure (the fallen robot/object), gazing up.
Sandy: Wow, is this made of titanium carbide?
Panel 7: A bespectacled man (the robot's pilot) answers.
Pilot: Tungsten carbide.
Panel 8: Sandy, shown topless from the chest up against a red background, throws her arms back in ecstasy.
Sandy: TAKE ME! TAKE ME NOW!!
Panel 9: The married husband watches from a distance, arms crossed, behind glass.
Panel 10: Scene shift to what appears to be an engineering school interview/admissions panel. An older bald man with glasses and a beard (an interviewer) addresses a younger blond man in glasses (David).
Interviewer: Your turn, David. Why do you want to become an engineer?
David: Hrm? Oh, uh, I like making things.
Votey:
The bald, bespectacled interviewer speaks again, looking faintly unsettled.
Interviewer: Weird. Everyone else said "revenge."
Pilot: Oh hey, Sandy. Remember me? You wouldn't be my high school prom date, but now I'm back, with a GIANT ROBOT. Bet you regret rejecting me now!
Panel 2: A blonde woman (Sandy) stands looking up.
Panel 3: A close interior shot. Sandy stands beside a man with a calm expression.
Sandy: Sorry, I'm married now. To the guy who wedgied you every day in high school.
Man: Heya.
Panel 4: A burst sound effect as something crashes down.
SFX: SKLOOSH!
Panel 5: Sandy, now looking delighted.
Sandy: Great! Now we can be together!
Panel 6: Sandy stands small at the base of a huge metallic structure (the fallen robot/object), gazing up.
Sandy: Wow, is this made of titanium carbide?
Panel 7: A bespectacled man (the robot's pilot) answers.
Pilot: Tungsten carbide.
Panel 8: Sandy, shown topless from the chest up against a red background, throws her arms back in ecstasy.
Sandy: TAKE ME! TAKE ME NOW!!
Panel 9: The married husband watches from a distance, arms crossed, behind glass.
Panel 10: Scene shift to what appears to be an engineering school interview/admissions panel. An older bald man with glasses and a beard (an interviewer) addresses a younger blond man in glasses (David).
Interviewer: Your turn, David. Why do you want to become an engineer?
David: Hrm? Oh, uh, I like making things.
Votey:
The bald, bespectacled interviewer speaks again, looking faintly unsettled.
Interviewer: Weird. Everyone else said "revenge."
Alt text
A vertical SMBC comic. A man pilots a giant robot looming over a city, taunting a woman named Sandy for rejecting him as his high school prom date — now he's back with a giant robot and bets she regrets it. Sandy says sorry, she's married now, to the guy who wedgied him every day in high school; the husband waves "Heya." With a crash (SKLOOSH!), the robot falls. But then Sandy, instead of being impressed by him, becomes enthralled by the robot's material: "Wow, is this made of titanium carbide?" "Tungsten carbide." Aroused, she throws her arms back, topless, crying "TAKE ME! TAKE ME NOW!!" while her husband watches from behind glass. The scene cuts to an engineering school interview: a bald, bearded interviewer asks a young man named David why he wants to become an engineer; David shrugs, "Hrm? Oh, uh, I like making things." Votey panel: the interviewer, looking unsettled, replies, "Weird. Everyone else said 'revenge.'" The joke: most engineers are motivated by revenge against those who spurned them, and the robot's exotic material — not the man — is what wins the woman over.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.