2010-09-23
Original: 2010-09-23 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1 (red caption bar): IT'S A FACT OF REALITY THAT ANY ARGUMENT CAN BE DESTROYED BY NIHILISM.
Scene: A bearded man with glasses faces a man with reddish-brown hair (seen from behind).
Bearded man: REALITY IS SUBJECTIVE, SO NOBODY WINS THE DEBATE!
Bearded man (thought/aside): STUPID EXISTENTIALIST DEBATE CLUB.
Panel 2 (red caption bar): STRANGELY, IT CAN COME FROM ANY EPISTEMOLOGICAL DIRECTION...
The panel is split into two labeled halves: POSTMODERNIST (left, green) and SKEPTIC (right, gray).
Postmodernist side: A person greets another. Greeter: HEY, HOW ARE YOU? Other person: THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS TRUTH!
Skeptic side: One person says: HERE ARE 42 EVIDENCE-BASED ARGUMENTS FOR MY VIEW. The other replies: SO... NOT 43? 43 WOULD'VE OVERCOME MY STATUS QUO BIAS.
Panel 3 (red caption bar): THE FACT THAT LOGIC ISN'T SELF-PROVING IS PROBABLY A SALIENT FEATURE OF REALITY, BUT IT ISN'T TERRIBLY PRAGMATIC.
Scene: A customer (blonde, red shirt) at a fast-food counter holding a burger, facing a cashier in a yellow shirt and paper hat. The counter reads SOKALBURGER.
Customer: I ASKED FOR NO CHEESE ON THIS.
Cashier: SORRY, REALITY IS A LIE.
Panel 4 (red caption bar): SO, NEXT TIME YOU GET INTO A DISCUSSION, DON'T BE A PREMATURE NIHILATOR.
Yellow inset caption: TWO MINUTES INTO A DEBATE...
Scene: A smiling dark-haired woman talks to a red-haired man who is gripping his face in panic.
Woman: WELL, ACCORDING TO ARROW'S THEOREM, YOU'RE WRONG--
Red-haired man: OH GOD... OH GOD... FACTS ARE INSCRUTABLE! FACTS ARE INSCRUTABLE! sorry...
Panel 5 (no caption):
Woman: *sigh* THAT'S OKAY. YOU GOOD TO DEBATE A LITTLE MORE NOW?
Red-haired man (scratching head, looking drained): I'M KINDA TIRED?
Votey:
A drawing of a cheeseburger above the text: SOKALBURGER: OBJECTIVELY TASTY
Scene: A bearded man with glasses faces a man with reddish-brown hair (seen from behind).
Bearded man: REALITY IS SUBJECTIVE, SO NOBODY WINS THE DEBATE!
Bearded man (thought/aside): STUPID EXISTENTIALIST DEBATE CLUB.
Panel 2 (red caption bar): STRANGELY, IT CAN COME FROM ANY EPISTEMOLOGICAL DIRECTION...
The panel is split into two labeled halves: POSTMODERNIST (left, green) and SKEPTIC (right, gray).
Postmodernist side: A person greets another. Greeter: HEY, HOW ARE YOU? Other person: THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS TRUTH!
Skeptic side: One person says: HERE ARE 42 EVIDENCE-BASED ARGUMENTS FOR MY VIEW. The other replies: SO... NOT 43? 43 WOULD'VE OVERCOME MY STATUS QUO BIAS.
Panel 3 (red caption bar): THE FACT THAT LOGIC ISN'T SELF-PROVING IS PROBABLY A SALIENT FEATURE OF REALITY, BUT IT ISN'T TERRIBLY PRAGMATIC.
Scene: A customer (blonde, red shirt) at a fast-food counter holding a burger, facing a cashier in a yellow shirt and paper hat. The counter reads SOKALBURGER.
Customer: I ASKED FOR NO CHEESE ON THIS.
Cashier: SORRY, REALITY IS A LIE.
Panel 4 (red caption bar): SO, NEXT TIME YOU GET INTO A DISCUSSION, DON'T BE A PREMATURE NIHILATOR.
Yellow inset caption: TWO MINUTES INTO A DEBATE...
Scene: A smiling dark-haired woman talks to a red-haired man who is gripping his face in panic.
Woman: WELL, ACCORDING TO ARROW'S THEOREM, YOU'RE WRONG--
Red-haired man: OH GOD... OH GOD... FACTS ARE INSCRUTABLE! FACTS ARE INSCRUTABLE! sorry...
Panel 5 (no caption):
Woman: *sigh* THAT'S OKAY. YOU GOOD TO DEBATE A LITTLE MORE NOW?
Red-haired man (scratching head, looking drained): I'M KINDA TIRED?
Votey:
A drawing of a cheeseburger above the text: SOKALBURGER: OBJECTIVELY TASTY
Alt text
A five-panel SMBC comic, each panel topped by a red caption bar, about how nihilism can derail any argument. Panel 1 caption: 'It's a fact of reality that any argument can be destroyed by nihilism.' A bearded man in glasses tells a man with reddish hair, 'Reality is subjective, so nobody wins the debate!' then mutters, 'Stupid existentialist debate club.' Panel 2 caption notes it can come from any epistemological direction; the panel splits into a green 'POSTMODERNIST' half where someone answers 'Hey, how are you?' with 'There's no such thing as truth!', and a gray 'SKEPTIC' half where 'Here are 42 evidence-based arguments for my view' gets the reply 'So... not 43? 43 would've overcome my status quo bias.' Panel 3 caption observes logic isn't self-proving but also isn't pragmatic; at a fast-food counter labeled SOKALBURGER, a customer holding a burger says 'I asked for no cheese on this' and the cashier replies 'Sorry, reality is a lie.' Panel 4 caption advises not to be a premature nihilator; an inset reads 'Two minutes into a debate...' A grinning woman says 'Well, according to Arrow's theorem, you're wrong--' while a red-haired man clutches his face screaming 'Oh god... facts are inscrutable! Facts are inscrutable! sorry...' Panel 5: the woman sighs, 'That's okay. You good to debate a little more now?' and the exhausted man weakly answers 'I'm kinda tired?' Votey: a drawing of a cheeseburger with the caption 'SOKALBURGER: OBJECTIVELY TASTY.'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.