2010-02-22
Original: 2010-02-22 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A red-haired man in a blue shirt looks anxious and distressed, mouth turned down.
Panel 2: The same man's expression softens into a small, sly half-smile.
Panel 3: The man grins broadly, eyes shut, beaming with elation.
Panel 4: The man's expression collapses back into glum, deflated unhappiness.
Below the panels is a hand-drawn line graph titled by its axes. The vertical axis is unlabeled; the horizontal axis reads "TIME".
Label (blue curve): MASTURBATION GUILT
Label (red curve): AROUSAL
The red AROUSAL curve starts low, rises to a sharp tall spike in the middle, then crashes down. The blue MASTURBATION GUILT curve starts high, dips down to a sharp low valley exactly where arousal spikes, then climbs back up high. The two curves mirror and cross each other.
Votey:
A hand-drawn graph in a single black-bordered panel. A curve starts high on the left and slopes down toward the bottom right. An arrow points to the top-left of the curve with the label "10,000 KiloWeiners".
Panel 2: The same man's expression softens into a small, sly half-smile.
Panel 3: The man grins broadly, eyes shut, beaming with elation.
Panel 4: The man's expression collapses back into glum, deflated unhappiness.
Below the panels is a hand-drawn line graph titled by its axes. The vertical axis is unlabeled; the horizontal axis reads "TIME".
Label (blue curve): MASTURBATION GUILT
Label (red curve): AROUSAL
The red AROUSAL curve starts low, rises to a sharp tall spike in the middle, then crashes down. The blue MASTURBATION GUILT curve starts high, dips down to a sharp low valley exactly where arousal spikes, then climbs back up high. The two curves mirror and cross each other.
Votey:
A hand-drawn graph in a single black-bordered panel. A curve starts high on the left and slopes down toward the bottom right. An arrow points to the top-left of the curve with the label "10,000 KiloWeiners".
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic tracking a red-haired man's face as his emotions shift: anxious, then a sly smile, then a giant elated grin, then back to glum dejection. Below is a hand-drawn line graph with axes; the horizontal axis is labeled TIME. A blue curve labeled MASTURBATION GUILT starts high, plunges to a sharp valley, then rises again; a red curve labeled AROUSAL starts low, spikes sharply at the same point, then crashes. The two curves mirror each other inversely—arousal peaks exactly as guilt bottoms out—mapping onto the man's emotional arc. Votey: another hand-drawn graph, a curve sloping from high on the left down toward the bottom right, with an arrow pointing to its high left end labeled "10,000 KiloWeiners," giving the graph's peak an absurd mock-scientific unit.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.