2009-02-16
Original: 2009-02-16 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1 (caption): AND GOD SAW THAT ADAM WAS LONELY...
[Adam, a naked man with reddish hair, reclines against a green hillside resting his chin on his hand, looking glum. A glowing yellow sun shines in a blue sky.]
Panel 2 (caption): SO HE TOOK FROM ADAM A RIB...
[Adam lies asleep under a purple twilight sky. A beam of light from the yellow sun/orb extracts something from his side.]
Panel 3 (caption): AND CREATED...
[A laboratory scene against a brown background: the yellow orb hovers above a workbench holding lab equipment (jar, ring stand, flask).]
Panel 4 (caption): MASTURBATION!
[Adam looks on as a bottle labeled OIL, the yellow orb, and a box of tissues float in front of a hillside under a blue sky.]
Panel 5 (no caption):
[Adam stares at a box of tissues sitting in front of the glowing yellow orb.]
Panel 6:
Glowing yellow orb (God): NO GOOD?
[Adam, looking unimpressed, faces the orb with a tissue box and a tissue beside him.]
Votey:
Adam (gesturing, naked, to an unseen Eve): HEY EVE, I KNOW YOU SAID YOU WEREN'T IN THE MOOD, BUT- HEY! GOD INVENTED THAT FOR ME!!
[Adam, a naked man with reddish hair, reclines against a green hillside resting his chin on his hand, looking glum. A glowing yellow sun shines in a blue sky.]
Panel 2 (caption): SO HE TOOK FROM ADAM A RIB...
[Adam lies asleep under a purple twilight sky. A beam of light from the yellow sun/orb extracts something from his side.]
Panel 3 (caption): AND CREATED...
[A laboratory scene against a brown background: the yellow orb hovers above a workbench holding lab equipment (jar, ring stand, flask).]
Panel 4 (caption): MASTURBATION!
[Adam looks on as a bottle labeled OIL, the yellow orb, and a box of tissues float in front of a hillside under a blue sky.]
Panel 5 (no caption):
[Adam stares at a box of tissues sitting in front of the glowing yellow orb.]
Panel 6:
Glowing yellow orb (God): NO GOOD?
[Adam, looking unimpressed, faces the orb with a tissue box and a tissue beside him.]
Votey:
Adam (gesturing, naked, to an unseen Eve): HEY EVE, I KNOW YOU SAID YOU WEREN'T IN THE MOOD, BUT- HEY! GOD INVENTED THAT FOR ME!!
Alt text
A six-panel comic told as a Bible-style creation parody, with narration captions across the top of each panel. Panel 1, 'AND GOD SAW THAT ADAM WAS LONELY...': a glum naked man (Adam) reclines on a green hillside under a glowing yellow sun. Panel 2, 'SO HE TOOK FROM ADAM A RIB...': Adam sleeps as a beam from the yellow orb extracts something from his side. Panel 3, 'AND CREATED...': the orb hovers over a lab bench with jars and a flask. Panel 4, 'MASTURBATION!': a bottle labeled OIL, the orb, and a box of tissues float before Adam. Panel 5: Adam stares flatly at a tissue box in front of the orb. Panel 6: the glowing orb (God) asks 'NO GOOD?' while Adam looks unimpressed. Votey: Adam, gesturing toward an unseen partner, says 'HEY EVE, I KNOW YOU SAID YOU WEREN'T IN THE MOOD, BUT- HEY! GOD INVENTED THAT FOR ME!!'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.