Heart
Original: Heart on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
A shirtless man sits on an examination table.
Man (on table): Doc, ever since that new kind of surgery I've been changing. Did anything strange happen on the table?
Panel 2:
A doctor responds.
Doctor: When we took out your heart, we transplanted in the heart of... a CRIMINAL.
Panel 3:
The man, now with flame-like hair, lies down.
Man: Blue collar or white collar?
Panel 4:
Doctor (off-panel): White collar why?
Panel 5:
The flame-haired man looks pleased.
Man: Pardon me sir, but I must send an email.
Panel 6:
A book/report cover graphic with a smiling businessman photo.
Headline: BIOTECH COMPANY BANKRUPT AFTER SIDE EFFECTS IN HEART SURGERY TRIAL
Subhead/caption: INVESTOR MAKES MILLIONS SHORTING STOCK
Votey:
A close-up of the flame-haired man's face with a speech bubble.
Man: Technically, my heart never signed a confidentiality agreement.
A shirtless man sits on an examination table.
Man (on table): Doc, ever since that new kind of surgery I've been changing. Did anything strange happen on the table?
Panel 2:
A doctor responds.
Doctor: When we took out your heart, we transplanted in the heart of... a CRIMINAL.
Panel 3:
The man, now with flame-like hair, lies down.
Man: Blue collar or white collar?
Panel 4:
Doctor (off-panel): White collar why?
Panel 5:
The flame-haired man looks pleased.
Man: Pardon me sir, but I must send an email.
Panel 6:
A book/report cover graphic with a smiling businessman photo.
Headline: BIOTECH COMPANY BANKRUPT AFTER SIDE EFFECTS IN HEART SURGERY TRIAL
Subhead/caption: INVESTOR MAKES MILLIONS SHORTING STOCK
Votey:
A close-up of the flame-haired man's face with a speech bubble.
Man: Technically, my heart never signed a confidentiality agreement.
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic. Panel 1: a shirtless man sits on an exam table and tells his doctor that ever since a new kind of surgery he has been changing, asking if anything strange happened on the table. Panel 2: the doctor admits that when they removed the man's heart, they transplanted in the heart of a criminal. Panel 3: the patient, now drawn with spiky flame-like hair, calmly asks 'Blue collar or white collar?' Panel 4: the doctor asks 'White collar, why?' Panel 5: the flame-haired man looks pleased and says 'Pardon me sir, but I must send an email.' Panel 6: a glossy report/book cover with a smiling businessman reads 'BIOTECH COMPANY BANKRUPT AFTER SIDE EFFECTS IN HEART SURGERY TRIAL' with the caption 'INVESTOR MAKES MILLIONS SHORTING STOCK' — implying the man used his white-collar-criminal heart to short the very company that operated on him. Votey: a close-up of the flame-haired man's face saying 'Technically, my heart never signed a confidentiality agreement.'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.