the-autening
Original: the-autening on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Woman (off to the side): WHY ARE YOU WEARING A SWEATER? IT'S HOT OUT.
Bald bearded man: I AM RITUALLY SUMMONING FALLTIME.
Panel 2:
Bald bearded man (off-panel): LOOK! A LEAF FELL! IT'S WORKING!
(A single leaf falls near a house and a tree under a dark sky.)
Panel 3:
Bald bearded man (holding a mug): BEHOLD! I'M PRETENDING TO ENJOY MULLED WINE! IT TASTES LIKE MEDIEVAL PLAGUE MEDICINE BUT I AM DRINKING IT!
Bald bearded man: MAY THE ORANGEY RED GODS OF AUTUMN BE PLEASED WITH MY SUFFERING!
Panel 4:
Bald bearded man (arms raised, sweating, mouth wide open, surrounded by pumpkins; the woman watches skeptically): I WILL SACRIFICE TWO SHE-PUMPKINS WITHOUT BLEMISH UPON THEM! ONLY GRANT ME COOL WEATHER AND PIE!
Votey:
The bearded man, eyes closed and head bowed reverently: FALLELUJAH, AMEN.
Woman (off to the side): WHY ARE YOU WEARING A SWEATER? IT'S HOT OUT.
Bald bearded man: I AM RITUALLY SUMMONING FALLTIME.
Panel 2:
Bald bearded man (off-panel): LOOK! A LEAF FELL! IT'S WORKING!
(A single leaf falls near a house and a tree under a dark sky.)
Panel 3:
Bald bearded man (holding a mug): BEHOLD! I'M PRETENDING TO ENJOY MULLED WINE! IT TASTES LIKE MEDIEVAL PLAGUE MEDICINE BUT I AM DRINKING IT!
Bald bearded man: MAY THE ORANGEY RED GODS OF AUTUMN BE PLEASED WITH MY SUFFERING!
Panel 4:
Bald bearded man (arms raised, sweating, mouth wide open, surrounded by pumpkins; the woman watches skeptically): I WILL SACRIFICE TWO SHE-PUMPKINS WITHOUT BLEMISH UPON THEM! ONLY GRANT ME COOL WEATHER AND PIE!
Votey:
The bearded man, eyes closed and head bowed reverently: FALLELUJAH, AMEN.
Alt text
A four-panel comic. Panel 1: A woman asks a bald, bearded man, "Why are you wearing a sweater? It's hot out." He replies with an intense expression, "I am ritually summoning falltime." Panel 2: A view of a house and a tree under a dark sky with a single leaf drifting down; the man (off-panel) shouts, "Look! A leaf fell! It's working!" Panel 3: The man holds a steaming mug and declares, "Behold! I'm pretending to enjoy mulled wine! It tastes like medieval plague medicine but I am drinking it!" then, "May the orangey red gods of autumn be pleased with my suffering!" Panel 4: Drenched in sweat with arms raised and mouth wide open, the man stands among pumpkins as the woman watches skeptically: "I will sacrifice two she-pumpkins without blemish upon them! Only grant me cool weather and pie!" Votey: A loosely drawn sketch of the bearded man with his eyes closed and head bowed in mock prayer, saying "Fallelujah, amen." — a pun on "Hallelujah" using "fall."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.