trig-warning
Original: trig-warning on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Student (a person with curly dark hair, glasses, and an orange sweater, pointing angrily): PROFESSOR! YOU SON OF A BITCH!
Panel 2:
Student: COSINE IS JUST SINE SHIFTED OVER?! AND TANGENT IS JUST SINE DIVIDED BY SINE SHIFTED OVER?!
Panel 3:
Student: AND ALL THESE GODDAMNED RECIPROCAL FUNCTIONS ARE JUST THAT STUFF FLIPPED!?
Panel 4:
Student: I SPENT MONTHS! GODDAMNED MONTHS GETTING FLUENT WITH THE BEHAVIOR OF THESE THINGS AS IF THEY WERE ANIMALS IN A ZOO OF TRIG FUNCTIONS. THEY'RE ALL JUST SINE YOU BASTARD! JUST VARIATIONS ON SINE!
Panel 5:
Professor (an older man with a gray beard, glasses, and a dark suit, seated in a red chair): LOOK, THEY'LL ALL BE REALLY USEFUL IF YOU'RE EVER LOST AT SEA AND NEED TO CALCULATE LATITUDE AND HAVE NO CALCULATOR BUT HAPPEN TO BE IN POSSESSION OF A BOOK OF TRIGONOMETRIC TABLES.
Panel 6:
Student: THAT SHOULD BE ON PAGE ONE OF THE TEXTBOOK.
Panel 7:
Professor: WOULD YOU TAKE THAT COURSE?
Votey:
Professor (close-up, smiling): YOU HAVEN'T LIVED UNTIL YOU'VE HAND-CALCULATED A HAVERSINE, LET ME TELL YOU.
Student (a person with curly dark hair, glasses, and an orange sweater, pointing angrily): PROFESSOR! YOU SON OF A BITCH!
Panel 2:
Student: COSINE IS JUST SINE SHIFTED OVER?! AND TANGENT IS JUST SINE DIVIDED BY SINE SHIFTED OVER?!
Panel 3:
Student: AND ALL THESE GODDAMNED RECIPROCAL FUNCTIONS ARE JUST THAT STUFF FLIPPED!?
Panel 4:
Student: I SPENT MONTHS! GODDAMNED MONTHS GETTING FLUENT WITH THE BEHAVIOR OF THESE THINGS AS IF THEY WERE ANIMALS IN A ZOO OF TRIG FUNCTIONS. THEY'RE ALL JUST SINE YOU BASTARD! JUST VARIATIONS ON SINE!
Panel 5:
Professor (an older man with a gray beard, glasses, and a dark suit, seated in a red chair): LOOK, THEY'LL ALL BE REALLY USEFUL IF YOU'RE EVER LOST AT SEA AND NEED TO CALCULATE LATITUDE AND HAVE NO CALCULATOR BUT HAPPEN TO BE IN POSSESSION OF A BOOK OF TRIGONOMETRIC TABLES.
Panel 6:
Student: THAT SHOULD BE ON PAGE ONE OF THE TEXTBOOK.
Panel 7:
Professor: WOULD YOU TAKE THAT COURSE?
Votey:
Professor (close-up, smiling): YOU HAVEN'T LIVED UNTIL YOU'VE HAND-CALCULATED A HAVERSINE, LET ME TELL YOU.
Alt text
A seven-panel comic. A student with curly dark hair, glasses, and an orange sweater confronts an older bearded professor in a suit, seated in a red armchair. Panel 1: the student points angrily and shouts, "Professor! You son of a bitch!" Panel 2: "Cosine is just sine shifted over?! And tangent is just sine divided by sine shifted over?!" Panel 3: "And all these goddamned reciprocal functions are just that stuff flipped!?" Panel 4: "I spent months! Goddamned months getting fluent with the behavior of these things as if they were animals in a zoo of trig functions. They're all just sine you bastard! Just variations on sine!" Panel 5: the professor calmly replies, "Look, they'll all be really useful if you're ever lost at sea and need to calculate latitude and have no calculator but happen to be in possession of a book of trigonometric tables." Panel 6: the student deadpans, "That should be on page one of the textbook." Panel 7: the professor asks, "Would YOU take that course?" Votey (aftercomic): a close-up of the smiling professor saying, "You haven't lived until you've hand-calculated a haversine, let me tell you."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.