flood-2
Original: flood-2 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
God (speaking from off-panel/above): God, why do so many human societies have flood myths?
God (reply): Boy, apes are stupid.
Panel 2:
God: Gee, why would a land animal that dies in 3 days without water and dies in 3 minutes within water have stories about water?
Panel 3:
God: If birds could talk, they'd all have hurricane myths. If worms could talk, they'd all have earthquake myths, dummy.
Panel 4:
God: There are aliens you'll never meet who have stories about liquid methane floods and molten silicon floods. It's not a spooky mystery.
Panel 5:
God: Flood myths are just an obvious consequence of the fact that information aids survival and humans are bad at predicting what information will be useful in the future.
Panel 6:
Man (red hair): So you didn't murder 99% of humanity at once, then?
God: Look, okay, that's a totally separate question.
Votey: (none — no aftercomic image was available for this comic)
God (speaking from off-panel/above): God, why do so many human societies have flood myths?
God (reply): Boy, apes are stupid.
Panel 2:
God: Gee, why would a land animal that dies in 3 days without water and dies in 3 minutes within water have stories about water?
Panel 3:
God: If birds could talk, they'd all have hurricane myths. If worms could talk, they'd all have earthquake myths, dummy.
Panel 4:
God: There are aliens you'll never meet who have stories about liquid methane floods and molten silicon floods. It's not a spooky mystery.
Panel 5:
God: Flood myths are just an obvious consequence of the fact that information aids survival and humans are bad at predicting what information will be useful in the future.
Panel 6:
Man (red hair): So you didn't murder 99% of humanity at once, then?
God: Look, okay, that's a totally separate question.
Votey: (none — no aftercomic image was available for this comic)
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic. A red-haired man stands talking with God, whose voice comes from off-panel (a dark silhouette in the first panel). The man asks God why so many human societies have flood myths. God dismissively answers, "Boy, apes are stupid," then explains over several panels: a land animal that dies in 3 days without water and 3 minutes underwater would obviously tell water stories; birds would have hurricane myths and worms earthquake myths; even unmet aliens would have stories about methane and silicon floods. God concludes that flood myths are just an obvious consequence of information aiding survival while humans are bad at predicting what information will be useful. In the final panel the man, looking skeptical, asks, "So you didn't murder 99% of humanity at once, then?" God replies, "Look, okay, that's a totally separate question." The joke: God explains away flood myths as mundane while sidestepping the implication of the biblical Flood. No votey aftercomic image was available.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.