stare
Original: stare on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
A large blue robot with a single glowing yellow eye stands holding a tiny human. The robot speaks to an offscreen listener (another large machine to the right).
Robot: "I WAS JUST HAVING IT READ SOME HUMAN HISTORY ALOUD AND IT SEIZED UP! WON'T TALK, WON'T EAT. JUST STARES LIKE THERE'S SOMETHING FAR AWAY BUT IT CAN'T FOCUS!"
Caption (below panel): Inadvertently Calculac-4000 had bricked the human.
Votey:
A simple hand-drawn machine (a rounded dome shape with a small circle on it) speaks.
Machine: "TRY TURNING IT OFF FOREVER."
A large blue robot with a single glowing yellow eye stands holding a tiny human. The robot speaks to an offscreen listener (another large machine to the right).
Robot: "I WAS JUST HAVING IT READ SOME HUMAN HISTORY ALOUD AND IT SEIZED UP! WON'T TALK, WON'T EAT. JUST STARES LIKE THERE'S SOMETHING FAR AWAY BUT IT CAN'T FOCUS!"
Caption (below panel): Inadvertently Calculac-4000 had bricked the human.
Votey:
A simple hand-drawn machine (a rounded dome shape with a small circle on it) speaks.
Machine: "TRY TURNING IT OFF FOREVER."
Alt text
A large blue robot with a single glowing yellow eye holds a tiny limp human in one hand and complains to another big machine offscreen: "I was just having it read some human history aloud and it seized up! Won't talk, won't eat. Just stares like there's something far away but it can't focus!" The caption reads: "Inadvertently Calculac-4000 had bricked the human." The joke flips the usual tech-support scenario, treating a traumatized/overwhelmed human like a malfunctioning gadget. Votey: a crudely drawn dome-shaped machine offers tech-support advice: "Try turning it off forever."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.