whisk
Original: whisk on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
The comic is a two-column table titled with the headers "SPELLING" (left column) and "USAGE" (right column). Each row gives a spelling variant of the word whiskey and a note about when that spelling is used.
SPELLING: WHISKEY | USAGE: IN UNITED STATES, IRELAND
SPELLING: WHISKY | USAGE: EVERYWHERE ELSE
SPELLING: HWISKY | USAGE: WHENEVER DRUNKENLY PRETENDING TO KNOW HWAT OLD ENGLISH SOUNDS LIKE HWISKEY
SPELLING: HWISKEY | USAGE: (SEE HWAT'S IN ABOVE ROW, BUT FOR HWEN IN USA OR IRELAND)
SPELLING: UISCI | USAGE: USED BY ANCIENT DRUIDS AND DUNGEONS & DRAGONS PLAYERS
SPELLING: WHISKEYYYYYYYYYYYYY | USAGE: WHEN ASKING FOR FOURTH WHISKEY
SPELLING: WHISKI | USAGE: WHEN UNDER THE IMPRESSION "WHISKI" IS THE RUSSIAN SPELLING
SPELLING: HWISKYYYYYYYY | USAGE: HWEN ASKING FOR FOURTH HWISKY
SPELLING: BOURBON | USAGE: (ALL LETTERS SILENT EXCEPT FOR R, WHICH IS PRONOUNCED "WHISKEY.")
Votey:
Panel 1 (handwritten label): Whubbing alcohol
Panel 2 (handwritten label): Do not drink.
SPELLING: WHISKEY | USAGE: IN UNITED STATES, IRELAND
SPELLING: WHISKY | USAGE: EVERYWHERE ELSE
SPELLING: HWISKY | USAGE: WHENEVER DRUNKENLY PRETENDING TO KNOW HWAT OLD ENGLISH SOUNDS LIKE HWISKEY
SPELLING: HWISKEY | USAGE: (SEE HWAT'S IN ABOVE ROW, BUT FOR HWEN IN USA OR IRELAND)
SPELLING: UISCI | USAGE: USED BY ANCIENT DRUIDS AND DUNGEONS & DRAGONS PLAYERS
SPELLING: WHISKEYYYYYYYYYYYYY | USAGE: WHEN ASKING FOR FOURTH WHISKEY
SPELLING: WHISKI | USAGE: WHEN UNDER THE IMPRESSION "WHISKI" IS THE RUSSIAN SPELLING
SPELLING: HWISKYYYYYYYY | USAGE: HWEN ASKING FOR FOURTH HWISKY
SPELLING: BOURBON | USAGE: (ALL LETTERS SILENT EXCEPT FOR R, WHICH IS PRONOUNCED "WHISKEY.")
Votey:
Panel 1 (handwritten label): Whubbing alcohol
Panel 2 (handwritten label): Do not drink.
Alt text
A two-column table chart. The left column header is "SPELLING" and the right column header is "USAGE," listing increasingly absurd spelling variants of the word whiskey and when each is supposedly used. Rows: WHISKEY - in United States, Ireland. WHISKY - everywhere else. HWISKY - whenever drunkenly pretending to know what ("hwat") Old English sounds like ("hwiskey"). HWISKEY - same as above row, but for when ("hwen") in USA or Ireland. UISCI - used by ancient druids and Dungeons & Dragons players. WHISKEYYYYYYYYYYYYY - when asking for a fourth whiskey. WHISKI - when under the impression "whiski" is the Russian spelling. HWISKYYYYYYYY - when ("hwen") asking for a fourth whisky. BOURBON - all letters silent except for R, which is pronounced "whiskey." The votey (small bonus comic) shows two hand-drawn panels: the first labeled "Whubbing alcohol" (a slurred take on rubbing alcohol) and the second labeled "Do not drink."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.