auction
Original: auction on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Son: Dad, how do I know when I've found... the one?
Dad: Are you familiar with the concept of a Dutch auction?
Panel 2:
Dad: You set a price for an item. Then, you lower the price down and down until you find a bidder above your reserve-price.
Dad: If you get no bidders, you overvalued the item, so, you restart the auction at a lower reserve-price. Repeat until a taker comes. Voila, you've found the best that you could get.
Panel 3:
Son: Mom said lasting love isn't found, it's created together.
Dad: Yes, the equilibrium strategy is to destroy your partner's market value.
Votey:
Dad: If we model stability as happiness, having both partners be afraid to leave is equivalent to love.
Son: Dad, how do I know when I've found... the one?
Dad: Are you familiar with the concept of a Dutch auction?
Panel 2:
Dad: You set a price for an item. Then, you lower the price down and down until you find a bidder above your reserve-price.
Dad: If you get no bidders, you overvalued the item, so, you restart the auction at a lower reserve-price. Repeat until a taker comes. Voila, you've found the best that you could get.
Panel 3:
Son: Mom said lasting love isn't found, it's created together.
Dad: Yes, the equilibrium strategy is to destroy your partner's market value.
Votey:
Dad: If we model stability as happiness, having both partners be afraid to leave is equivalent to love.
Alt text
A three-panel comic. In panel 1, a young man asks his father, who is seated in an armchair, "Dad, how do I know when I've found... the one?" The dad replies, "Are you familiar with the concept of a Dutch auction?" In panel 2, the dad explains at length: "You set a price for an item. Then, you lower the price down and down until you find a bidder above your reserve-price. If you get no bidders, you overvalued the item, so you restart the auction at a lower reserve-price. Repeat until a taker comes. Voila, you've found the best that you could get." In panel 3, the son, looking unimpressed, says, "Mom said lasting love isn't found, it's created together." The dad answers, "Yes, the equilibrium strategy is to destroy your partner's market value." Votey (a single extra panel showing a close-up of the dad's face): "If we model stability as happiness, having both partners be afraid to leave is equivalent to love." The joke is the dad cynically reframing romance as game theory and market economics.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.