classics
Original: classics on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A bald older man with glasses, holding a book, looks annoyed.
Man: I'm tired of bowdlerized knockoffs of classic literature!
The book cover reads: "Dr. Seuss: Reimagined as prose stories about science trivia"
Panel 2: The man holds a sheaf of papers.
Man: My kids are gonna read THE ORIGINAL Wizard of Oz.
Caption between panels: LATER THAT EVENING
Panel 3: The man reads aloud from a book, looking unsettled.
Man: ...decapitates a lot of wolves. With a rusty axe.
(The open book shows an illustration of Dorothy.)
Panel 4: Close on the man's wide-eyed, disturbed face. In the background, a young child with curly hair sits up in bed, peering over the covers with a worried expression.
Man (off-panel speech bubble): God, imagine how much blood.
Votey:
Text in panel: WOW! IT'S BOOKENDED BY MURDERS!
Below the text is a drawing of a downturned mouth / unsettled face.
Man: I'm tired of bowdlerized knockoffs of classic literature!
The book cover reads: "Dr. Seuss: Reimagined as prose stories about science trivia"
Panel 2: The man holds a sheaf of papers.
Man: My kids are gonna read THE ORIGINAL Wizard of Oz.
Caption between panels: LATER THAT EVENING
Panel 3: The man reads aloud from a book, looking unsettled.
Man: ...decapitates a lot of wolves. With a rusty axe.
(The open book shows an illustration of Dorothy.)
Panel 4: Close on the man's wide-eyed, disturbed face. In the background, a young child with curly hair sits up in bed, peering over the covers with a worried expression.
Man (off-panel speech bubble): God, imagine how much blood.
Votey:
Text in panel: WOW! IT'S BOOKENDED BY MURDERS!
Below the text is a drawing of a downturned mouth / unsettled face.
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic. Panel 1: a bald man with glasses holds a book and complains, 'I'm tired of bowdlerized knockoffs of classic literature!' The book is titled 'Dr. Seuss: Reimagined as prose stories about science trivia.' Panel 2: he declares, 'My kids are gonna read THE ORIGINAL Wizard of Oz.' A caption reads 'LATER THAT EVENING.' Panel 3: now reading the real, gruesome original aloud, he says uneasily, '...decapitates a lot of wolves. With a rusty axe.' Panel 4: a close-up of his wide-eyed, horrified face as he mutters 'God, imagine how much blood,' while his small child watches anxiously from bed in the background. Votey (aftercomic): text reads 'WOW! IT'S BOOKENDED BY MURDERS!' above a drawing of an unsettled, frowning face. The joke: the unedited classic he insisted on turns out to be far more violent than the sanitized knockoffs he scorned.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.