self
Original: self on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Title (top): KNOW YOUR PHILOSOPHIES OF SELF:
Panel 1 — labeled "MONISM:"
A bald man in a pink robe with one arm outstretched.
Man: "We are all one."
Panel 2 — labeled "BAYESIAN MONISM"
A person in a green hooded cloak with a medallion, eyes wide.
Person: "We are all probably about one."
Panel 3 — labeled "UNUNOCTISM"
A bearded figure in robes raising one finger, standing at a lectern marked "CXVIII".
Figure: "We are all 118, which is pretty good."
Panel 4 — labeled "SINGLE-EXCLUSION MONISM"
A person at a podium addressing a red-haired man.
Speaker: "We are all one. Except Dave."
Red-haired man (Dave): "Eat shit, Dave."
Votey:
A bald, robed figure (the monist preacher) gestures, with a speech bubble.
Figure: "Now please rise, open your book of Dave to page 293 and give it the finger."
Panel 1 — labeled "MONISM:"
A bald man in a pink robe with one arm outstretched.
Man: "We are all one."
Panel 2 — labeled "BAYESIAN MONISM"
A person in a green hooded cloak with a medallion, eyes wide.
Person: "We are all probably about one."
Panel 3 — labeled "UNUNOCTISM"
A bearded figure in robes raising one finger, standing at a lectern marked "CXVIII".
Figure: "We are all 118, which is pretty good."
Panel 4 — labeled "SINGLE-EXCLUSION MONISM"
A person at a podium addressing a red-haired man.
Speaker: "We are all one. Except Dave."
Red-haired man (Dave): "Eat shit, Dave."
Votey:
A bald, robed figure (the monist preacher) gestures, with a speech bubble.
Figure: "Now please rise, open your book of Dave to page 293 and give it the finger."
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic titled "Know your philosophies of self," each panel labeling a different mock philosophy. Panel 1, "Monism": a bald man in a pink robe spreads his arm and declares "We are all one." Panel 2, "Bayesian Monism": a wide-eyed person in a green hooded cloak says "We are all probably about one." Panel 3, "Ununoctism": a bearded robed figure at a lectern marked "CXVIII" raises a finger and says "We are all 118, which is pretty good" (a pun on ununoctium, element 118). Panel 4, "Single-Exclusion Monism": a speaker at a podium says "We are all one. Except Dave," and a red-haired man replies "Eat shit, Dave" (calling himself Dave). The votey shows the robed monist preacher gesturing and saying "Now please rise, open your book of Dave to page 293 and give it the finger," framing the anti-Dave doctrine as a church ritual.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.