multiplanetary
Original: multiplanetary on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
An astronaut stands on the Martian surface near a landed rocket and a domed habitat.
Astronaut: FINALLY, MARS. HUMANS ARE NOW MULTIPLANETARY! WE HAVE SAVED THE SPECIES FOR ALL TIME!
Panel 2:
Caption: TWO WEEKS LATER...
The same astronaut, now hunched and brooding, sits apart from a group of other astronauts who cheer with raised fists.
Lone astronaut: JEEZ, I KINDA HATE EARTHLINGS. WAR?
Group of astronauts: WAR!
Panel 3:
Caption: AND SO...
A wide space view: Earth, cracked down the middle and surrounded by a red explosion/flames, hangs on the left. The sun (drawn with a small face) sits on the right against a starfield.
(no dialogue)
Votey:
(THIS HAPPENS APPRXIMATELY EVERY 4 BILLION YEARS)
An astronaut stands on the Martian surface near a landed rocket and a domed habitat.
Astronaut: FINALLY, MARS. HUMANS ARE NOW MULTIPLANETARY! WE HAVE SAVED THE SPECIES FOR ALL TIME!
Panel 2:
Caption: TWO WEEKS LATER...
The same astronaut, now hunched and brooding, sits apart from a group of other astronauts who cheer with raised fists.
Lone astronaut: JEEZ, I KINDA HATE EARTHLINGS. WAR?
Group of astronauts: WAR!
Panel 3:
Caption: AND SO...
A wide space view: Earth, cracked down the middle and surrounded by a red explosion/flames, hangs on the left. The sun (drawn with a small face) sits on the right against a starfield.
(no dialogue)
Votey:
(THIS HAPPENS APPRXIMATELY EVERY 4 BILLION YEARS)
Alt text
A three-panel SMBC comic. Panel 1: An astronaut stands triumphantly on the red Martian surface beside a landed rocket and a domed base, declaring, "Finally, Mars. Humans are now multiplanetary! We have saved the species for all time!" Panel 2, captioned "Two weeks later...": the astronaut now sits slumped and resentful while a cluster of other Mars astronauts cheer with raised fists. The lone astronaut grumbles, "Jeez, I kinda hate Earthlings. War?" and the group answers, "War!" Panel 3, captioned "And so...": a view of space shows Earth split down the middle and engulfed in a red explosion on the left, with a small-faced sun on the right. The joke: becoming multiplanetary doesn't save humanity from itself; the new colony promptly turns on the home planet. Votey caption: "(This happens apprximately every 4 billion years)."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.