daddies
Original: daddies on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Child (in bed): How are mommies different from daddies?
Mother (lying in bed beside the child): Mommies are like physicists and daddies are like computer scientists.
Panel 2:
Mother: Mommies look at you and see a continuous spectrum of all sorts of states of emotional and physical well-being.
Panel 3:
Mother: Daddies see precisely two discrete states: dead and not-dead.
Panel 4:
Mother: This is why mommy gently shampoos your hair and protects your eyes and daddy blasts you with cold water while calling you a wuss.
Panel 5:
Mother: But Sally's dad cares about her feelings and stuff.
Father (now in the bed): Yes, he's what's called an "applied parent." I do THEORETICAL parenting.
Votey:
A hand-drawn sketch of the father's face. Speech bubble: Pure parenting
Child (in bed): How are mommies different from daddies?
Mother (lying in bed beside the child): Mommies are like physicists and daddies are like computer scientists.
Panel 2:
Mother: Mommies look at you and see a continuous spectrum of all sorts of states of emotional and physical well-being.
Panel 3:
Mother: Daddies see precisely two discrete states: dead and not-dead.
Panel 4:
Mother: This is why mommy gently shampoos your hair and protects your eyes and daddy blasts you with cold water while calling you a wuss.
Panel 5:
Mother: But Sally's dad cares about her feelings and stuff.
Father (now in the bed): Yes, he's what's called an "applied parent." I do THEORETICAL parenting.
Votey:
A hand-drawn sketch of the father's face. Speech bubble: Pure parenting
Alt text
A five-panel SMBC comic. A child in bed asks a parent how mommies are different from daddies. The mother, lying beside the child, explains: mommies are like physicists and daddies are like computer scientists. Mommies see a continuous spectrum of all sorts of emotional and physical well-being, while daddies see precisely two discrete states: dead and not-dead. This is why mommy gently shampoos the child's hair and protects their eyes, while daddy blasts them with cold water while calling them a wuss. The child notes that Sally's dad cares about her feelings; the father, now in the bed, replies that Sally's dad is an "applied parent" while he does THEORETICAL parenting. The votey (aftercomic) is a rough hand-drawn sketch of the father's smug, half-asleep face with a speech bubble reading "Pure parenting," punning on pure (theoretical) versus applied mathematics.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.