human-jobs
Original: human-jobs on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Worried man: Now that artificial intelligence has surpassed humans, what will we do for jobs? How will I eat? How will I have shelter?
A robot (off to the side, near a building labeled "HUMAN TEMP AGENCY"): Relax.
Panel 2:
Robot: There are still LOTS of tasks for which human beings will always want a fellow human.
Panel 3:
Worried man: Like for compassion. Or understanding.
Robot: Nah. Robots with fMRI analysis are way better at that.
Panel 4:
Man: Then what?
Panel 5:
Robot (seated at a desk/computer): Here's a hot lead for you.
Panel 6:
A screen/listing showing a bald man's face and the text: "Human-furniture fetishist seeks new footstool."
Votey:
Man: I have a college degree. Can I be called "an ottoman.?"
Reply (off-panel): Absolutely not.
Worried man: Now that artificial intelligence has surpassed humans, what will we do for jobs? How will I eat? How will I have shelter?
A robot (off to the side, near a building labeled "HUMAN TEMP AGENCY"): Relax.
Panel 2:
Robot: There are still LOTS of tasks for which human beings will always want a fellow human.
Panel 3:
Worried man: Like for compassion. Or understanding.
Robot: Nah. Robots with fMRI analysis are way better at that.
Panel 4:
Man: Then what?
Panel 5:
Robot (seated at a desk/computer): Here's a hot lead for you.
Panel 6:
A screen/listing showing a bald man's face and the text: "Human-furniture fetishist seeks new footstool."
Votey:
Man: I have a college degree. Can I be called "an ottoman.?"
Reply (off-panel): Absolutely not.
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic. Panel 1: A worried red-haired man frets, "Now that artificial intelligence has surpassed humans, what will we do for jobs? How will I eat? How will I have shelter?" Beside a building labeled "HUMAN TEMP AGENCY," a robot says, "Relax." Panel 2: The robot reassures him, "There are still LOTS of tasks for which human beings will always want a fellow human." Panel 3: The man offers, "Like for compassion. Or understanding." The robot replies, "Nah. Robots with fMRI analysis are way better at that." Panel 4: The man asks, "Then what?" Panel 5: The robot, now at a desk, says, "Here's a hot lead for you." Panel 6: A screen shows a bald man's face with a job listing: "Human-furniture fetishist seeks new footstool" — the punchline being that the only human-exclusive jobs left are demeaning fetish ones. Votey (bonus panel): The job-seeking man, looking glum, asks, "I have a college degree. Can I be called 'an ottoman.?'" An off-panel voice answers, "Absolutely not."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.