space-poop
Original: space-poop on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: Two people stand on a hill at night under a starry sky.
Lighter-skinned person with reddish-brown hair: "Did you know that the first men on the moon pooped there?"
Panel 2:
Dark-haired person: "I guess you don't think about it, but yeah. And they would've left it on the surface since it's excess mass."
Panel 3:
Lighter-skinned person: "It's been there ever since, twirling its way around the pale blue dot below."
Panel 4: A small figure stands at the edge of a cliff looking up at the sky.
Dark-haired person: "On the 50th anniversary of Apollo 11, Neil Armstrong's poop will have gone around the Earth about 650 times."
Panel 5: Close on the dark-haired person.
Dark-haired person: "Given the expense of going to the moon, the questionable economics of a lunar settlement, and the lingering possibility of human self-annihilation, that poop may be up there longer than we're down here."
Panel 6: A crescent moon hangs in a starry sky.
Lighter-skinned person (off-panel): "That's the saddest emblem of humanity's fallen space-dreams I've ever heard."
Panel 7: The two people stand together looking up at the stars.
Panel 8: The scene goes dark; only the white silhouettes of the two figures are visible.
Dark-haired person: "Actually, no. It's just the grossest."
Dark-haired person: "There's a lot of puke up there too."
Votey:
Handwritten text: "Someday... Mars..."
Below it, a small loose sketch of a rocket's looping flight path and a figure.
Lighter-skinned person with reddish-brown hair: "Did you know that the first men on the moon pooped there?"
Panel 2:
Dark-haired person: "I guess you don't think about it, but yeah. And they would've left it on the surface since it's excess mass."
Panel 3:
Lighter-skinned person: "It's been there ever since, twirling its way around the pale blue dot below."
Panel 4: A small figure stands at the edge of a cliff looking up at the sky.
Dark-haired person: "On the 50th anniversary of Apollo 11, Neil Armstrong's poop will have gone around the Earth about 650 times."
Panel 5: Close on the dark-haired person.
Dark-haired person: "Given the expense of going to the moon, the questionable economics of a lunar settlement, and the lingering possibility of human self-annihilation, that poop may be up there longer than we're down here."
Panel 6: A crescent moon hangs in a starry sky.
Lighter-skinned person (off-panel): "That's the saddest emblem of humanity's fallen space-dreams I've ever heard."
Panel 7: The two people stand together looking up at the stars.
Panel 8: The scene goes dark; only the white silhouettes of the two figures are visible.
Dark-haired person: "Actually, no. It's just the grossest."
Dark-haired person: "There's a lot of puke up there too."
Votey:
Handwritten text: "Someday... Mars..."
Below it, a small loose sketch of a rocket's looping flight path and a figure.
Alt text
An eight-panel SMBC comic. Two people stand on a hill beneath a starry night sky. A lighter-skinned person with reddish-brown hair asks, "Did you know that the first men on the moon pooped there?" Their dark-haired companion explains that yes, the astronauts would have left it on the surface since it's excess mass, and that it has been orbiting "the pale blue dot" ever since. By the 50th anniversary of Apollo 11, they say, Neil Armstrong's poop will have circled Earth about 650 times. In a wide shot of a tiny figure on a cliff, the dark-haired person muses that given the expense of going to the moon, shaky lunar economics, and the chance of human self-annihilation, the poop may be up there longer than humanity is down here. Looking at a lone crescent moon, the lighter-haired person calls it "the saddest emblem of humanity's fallen space-dreams." In the final dark panel, lit only by the two white silhouettes, the dark-haired person replies, "Actually, no. It's just the grossest. There's a lot of puke up there too." The votey afterimage shows handwritten words "Someday... Mars..." above a small loose doodle of a rocket's looping flight path, suggesting the same fate awaits future missions.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.