statistical-flowers-for-algernon
Original: statistical-flowers-for-algernon on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Doctor: I'm going to give you a pill that'll double your intelligence.
Patient: Thanks, Doc!
Panel 2 (caption: MONTHS LATER...):
Doctor: Now that you're smarter I bet you're feeling more dissociated from society! More horrified by human limitation! More repulsed by the frailty of this tragic farce!
Patient: Nah.
Panel 3:
Patient: That's a literary myth. Suicide rate, for instance, is anti-correlated with I.Q. The best statistical evidence suggests greater intelligence increases happiness, cooperativeness, and productivity.
Panel 4:
Patient: It also makes you annoying.
Doctor: It's nice to know you've read SOME of the literature.
Votey:
I would pay good money to see this version of "Flowers for Algernon."
Doctor: I'm going to give you a pill that'll double your intelligence.
Patient: Thanks, Doc!
Panel 2 (caption: MONTHS LATER...):
Doctor: Now that you're smarter I bet you're feeling more dissociated from society! More horrified by human limitation! More repulsed by the frailty of this tragic farce!
Patient: Nah.
Panel 3:
Patient: That's a literary myth. Suicide rate, for instance, is anti-correlated with I.Q. The best statistical evidence suggests greater intelligence increases happiness, cooperativeness, and productivity.
Panel 4:
Patient: It also makes you annoying.
Doctor: It's nice to know you've read SOME of the literature.
Votey:
I would pay good money to see this version of "Flowers for Algernon."
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic. Panel 1: A doctor in a suit tells a seated patient, "I'm going to give you a pill that'll double your intelligence," and the patient replies, "Thanks, Doc!" Panel 2, captioned "MONTHS LATER...": The doctor, looking gleeful, says, "Now that you're smarter I bet you're feeling more dissociated from society! More horrified by human limitation! More repulsed by the frailty of this tragic farce!" The patient flatly answers, "Nah." Panel 3: The patient explains calmly, "That's a literary myth. Suicide rate, for instance, is anti-correlated with I.Q. The best statistical evidence suggests greater intelligence increases happiness, cooperativeness, and productivity." Panel 4: The patient adds, "It also makes you annoying," and the doctor replies, "It's nice to know you've read SOME of the literature." The joke subverts the trope that genius brings despair, with the smarter patient being well-adjusted but smug. Votey (a single hand-lettered after-panel): "I would pay good money to see this version of 'Flowers for Algernon.'"
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.